Indian Ameri

Tuesday

Scientific Archery - Epics Revamped

Am dead tired from work. So please bear with the blah blah blah that follows.

Ever wondered what happens to all the arrows that get destroyed in the blue lit sky when Ram fights Karna (Am too tired to explain the original people in the epics. Just imagine beyond the characters)? Seriously I am left clueless. Instead of finding evidence of the piled up broken arrows (John Travolta would have wooed on this fight scene) or shards of lumber killing the many million foot soldiers, I decided to go insanely crazy in imagining about archery of the epics. Let me put my scientific crap for some comparisons. (Hey truly, I was asked to explain the various arrows used in Indian epics to an American. What better way to explain to an American than using science. At least she showed interest in this kinda description);

1. First the single arrow that transforms into a 7 by 7 matrix of multiarrows (I call them ALV's - arrow launch vehicle) - Matter created from matter is acceptable, but matter created from the same matter? Definitely these define cellular mitosis and meiosis.
2. Napalm arrow - more like a fire spitting dragon. Well scientifically saying, I'd compare it to a simple heat of reaction obtained from an atmospherically unstable wood. There is energy provided by the arrow (thanks to the mantras recited before launch), oxygen from the atmosphere and heat from the friction produced by air drag.
3. Water raining arrow - What did you think? If there's fire, there's ought to be water too ;). Well in this case, the arrow is at its supercooled state inside the bag of arrows. Once taken outside it starts melting at an exponential rate and thus gushes enough water to win over the dragon arrow. Strangely I can't explain the fact of why the water is still nozzled to the front.. (Any geeky suggestions?)
4. Energy arrows - Well these are arrows supposed to have special energies/powers to kill people. In this case when two energy arrows hit, it's mere fusion and wallah - instant nuclear holocaust. Luckily these energies dissipate in the atmosphere itself.
5. Snake arrow - My favorite one. This arrow transforms itself into a viper and can kill the opponent with its bite - Matter into Life. Now you know how life came to earth. There is this sudden pressure gradient at the tip of the arrow, and excessive heat produced by the radiating sun and enough gases in the atmosphere to start a Frankenstein process and "It's alive... It's alive..... It's A L I V E"
6. Mustard gas arrow - Obviously a poisonous gas emanating arrow. This is mere extension of the water gushing arrow. Solid state to gaseous state. Simple....
7. Sleep inducing arrow - Chloroform existed back in the old ages. Think people. Think nerdy....

And now with the arrows depleting from the ammunition deck, it's time to throw other stuff;

8. The Chakra - Kitcha Niveda Mulaliiiiiiii. Spinning wheel with a sharp cog. More like a frizbee action. If dogs were used in these wars, there would have been no deaths. Just "Here boy. (whistle whistle whistle) here boy (Tssk tssk tssk)" and woosh followed by bow bow bow and a sticky licky tongue
9. The swords - I wonder why they throw the swords for no reason. I'd rather walk across the war field and say "Anga! Let's fence. First one to bleed loses"
10. Clubs - Naaay! It's too heavy to throw clubs. Let's carry them down the aisle of death and start smashing each others skull.
posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Tuesday, March 25, 2008

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