Indian Ameri


Bumpy start to the week

"56 F. I can never understand what it means. I am a Desi" and switched to the metric system in my page. "13 degrees C and scattered showers. Hmmmm. I'll walk without the umbrella"
After depositing a couple of checks in the Clinic ATM I walked out and to my dismay it was raining cats and dogs and even donkeys. The gtalk status message idea-bulb popped and the filament burned strong. "He who knows his way around, knows how to keep his glasses dry"
A couple of minutes into the challenge, successfully routing through various administrative buildings, I ended up on a cross road. The next nearest shelter against rain was at least fifty meters from the spot I was standing toiling my mind over plausible other options.
A few minutes later, I reached my lab, knocked my head into the emergency lab shower and laughed at my accomplishment. Now, now. Don't assume that I made it across fifty meters of roofless rainy sky without getting wet. I just kept my word by removing my glasses and keeping it in my backpack (now you know why I got bumped into the shower)
;) :D
posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Monday, March 31, 2008 1 comments


Pharaoh of the Wanted Heart

“Had a terribly day. This one shall just add up to the misery” is what I said to myself before I restarted the movie “Anbe Sivam” ('Love is God' in Tamil and the love, mentioned here is anything with care). I knew what mess I would be at, but decided to face lurking in the past and ended up accepting defeat in overcoming nostalgia. But I knew what I was doing. The scene when Madhavan questions the plan of God and for which Kamal responds with the concept of ‘Everyone is God’ was the one scene I was most apprehensive about and yes it did take its effect on me (ended up longing for a person who had the qualities of Nalla Sivam). Thought that he weekend was a definite goner. Instead of the memories of ‘getting emotionally attached' to SMILE, looming to enslave my merriness, it showered many a sheepish smiles and nods of ‘unbelievably that was me then’.

“You like Pharaohs?” and the sound of “Yaaaaaaeeeeeeeesssssssssssssssss” from the bunch of sheep counters made me go for it. I did shave my busy beard into a Pharaoh patch. But I lost myself into some old memories of fun and laughter and accidentally diced the longitudinal facial hair. And there I was, with the Pharaoh wanting from the heart (Dil Chahta Hai Aamir Khan look) and I decided to stick on to it. I’m dedicating this effort of going beyond the usual devadoss or French beard for the many fond attached memories with SMILE.

I was happy enough with the change that it took me half a dozen long jumps missing grass lawns, hopping pavements with the usual skip-slide style (which I haven't done for quite some time), high jumping small walls, tight roping a few benches, dunking in basketball courts, a couple of sprints among crossings, snaking around pillar lights and finally some lay time on the grass glaring at stars, to come to normalcy. Spent the next couple of hours sharing joy with an out bound friend. The last time I went to India, I kept French Beard for the first time in States for him. Strangely this time he is leaving to India, and am with this new style.

Came back home and checked my inbox to find out that I was represented in last weekends Sunday Herald under the title ‘Doctor Swigs Drug for Science”. Statistically saying, I was represented just as a mere data point in a plot. (I didn’t take any experimental drug. I just gave deoxygenated blood samples after a series of exercises for scientific reasons. So guys please save your efforts in throwing concerned invectives at me). Since the volunteering money served no purpose for myself now, I chipped in to a few causes which I always wanted to do. “O Srinivasan students! You guys sticking to the 2% salary donations theme?” Felt awesome to spend the rest of the lonely night in good mood.

Off The Pharaoh: Got electrocuted for a micro second while trying to turn the power back to my apartment. Thanks to the faulty adapter my roomie installed for his remote controlled hummer. Had a terrible day using my hand eye coordination trying to set up the atomic force microscope in a particular mode and went through a series of troubles related to mechanics, electronics, electrics, etc. Though I was pretty much pissed off at the end of the day unable to get my analysis done (thanks to the three time breaking of cantilevers) and sticking on to my promise of getting the result for Monday’s meeting, I was greasy proud to see the machine patched up for future use for the sole user – I and I only. Spent the whole day listening to only three songs (during instrument set up) which I’ve been humming for the past 7-8 months and not listened to (its that kind of songs which keeps on running in your head even if there’s a master piece blaring in the radio). They were Oasis – Wonderwall, Lakshya – Kitni Baatein and Scrubs theme – I’m no Superman (which I’ve been singing around in the lab with Don and also sung embarrassingly loud enough, when Dr. Hastings entered the AFM lab, to show his collaborators on the available facility). I got to get control over my shower singing instincts, in public places and among friends, before I embarrass myself more. I would have run at least 2 miles this week, fitting in crucial analysis time to be in the lab and also in the AFM lab and other places. Had terrible news from Student government early in the morning and am figuring out options to get things done (which I’ve not yet encountered) before I talk with the rest of the team. Got self-, motivated- and friendly-appreciation on tackling a tricky situation related to a friend’s plea to solve his business crisis. Now I’m offered a job from a leading business consultancy (tempting enough in the monetary basis. But not tempting enough to quit blinding my dreams). It just made my life easy enough not to question my crazy future plans. Finally found a guy to sponsor my East Lansing tournament participation (go for the two second rapture dance). And guess what! There is going to be a biker’s tournament too on the same day. If the schedule looks good, I might end up participating in that too (hope am not rusty enough to crash in the first lap itself)

posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Saturday, March 29, 2008 4 comments


Explain your Mom!

When it comes to elucidating research, there are two kinds of audience – the astutely crafted, proficiently sapient, ingeniously erudite, schooled peers and the other is the simple layman. While the cognitive details of technical stuff and creative analysis is growing at a ramped pace, the use of proper jargon is going to the drain, when it comes to facing my peers. Blame it on my frying neuron connectors. But, the art of interacting with the world around me, and its myriads of human interpretation, the layman terms has helped me secure a decent image of representing my good work, to one and all who ask what significance and impact my work has in the future.

But yesterday night/early morning, for the first time I encountered the third class of an audience. Well statistically saying, this class of representatives in fact is comprised of one sole leader and that sole leader is the only sole person in the class. I would call this class as “The Mom!”

As Elmer Fudd would say “Ssshhhhh….. Be veri veri careful. Wabbit footprints” Mom’s have this unique ability to judge the level of work load, just by noticing your waist line. The smaller the waist line (you might be dancing flamingos but not her) the longer the cribbing of “eat your meal on time. Don't skip it.” If you think, using technical jargon might throw her off the board, then you guessed wrong. Remember, that she used to help you with your homework when you didn’t even know what science meant. You give her an apt idea of what your research might do in the future, 'Bham' you’re a sitting duck. She’ll start becoming your secretary and might organize even your future experiments (at least my mom can). There are numerous factors that come into the picture while talking to your mom. But the important one is, she should never know how hard (on the contrary sometimes even the amount of fun) your working.

Make sure that you give her the end goal, a prospective public-affection, a profitable materialization from your intellectual fantasy, and a few analogies related to your native past. The best would be to utilize past examples involving human emotions, pains, lives, etc and giving her the beyond black-hole perspective based on your accessible research to serve humanity.

I did a job, perfect enough, over a wireless period of sixty minutes that at the end, she turned into a socially-concerned-son-sacrificing-mom. In her words, “You make this work for humanity. That is the biggest gift you can give me. Take your time and don’t think of anything else”

Taking advantage of the situation I asked her, “Anything?” for which she replied “Anything Kanna!” An evil villain’s wide angled smirk appeared under my bed sheet and in the next ten seconds I made a deal with her and bid goodbye on the phone.

Wiping the imaginary sweat of my brow under my sheets, I thought “Bachelor life for the next many years. Awesome dude. Nice deal. Two thumbs up!!” =))

posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Wednesday, March 26, 2008 1 comments


Scientific Archery - Epics Revamped

Am dead tired from work. So please bear with the blah blah blah that follows.

Ever wondered what happens to all the arrows that get destroyed in the blue lit sky when Ram fights Karna (Am too tired to explain the original people in the epics. Just imagine beyond the characters)? Seriously I am left clueless. Instead of finding evidence of the piled up broken arrows (John Travolta would have wooed on this fight scene) or shards of lumber killing the many million foot soldiers, I decided to go insanely crazy in imagining about archery of the epics. Let me put my scientific crap for some comparisons. (Hey truly, I was asked to explain the various arrows used in Indian epics to an American. What better way to explain to an American than using science. At least she showed interest in this kinda description);

1. First the single arrow that transforms into a 7 by 7 matrix of multiarrows (I call them ALV's - arrow launch vehicle) - Matter created from matter is acceptable, but matter created from the same matter? Definitely these define cellular mitosis and meiosis.
2. Napalm arrow - more like a fire spitting dragon. Well scientifically saying, I'd compare it to a simple heat of reaction obtained from an atmospherically unstable wood. There is energy provided by the arrow (thanks to the mantras recited before launch), oxygen from the atmosphere and heat from the friction produced by air drag.
3. Water raining arrow - What did you think? If there's fire, there's ought to be water too ;). Well in this case, the arrow is at its supercooled state inside the bag of arrows. Once taken outside it starts melting at an exponential rate and thus gushes enough water to win over the dragon arrow. Strangely I can't explain the fact of why the water is still nozzled to the front.. (Any geeky suggestions?)
4. Energy arrows - Well these are arrows supposed to have special energies/powers to kill people. In this case when two energy arrows hit, it's mere fusion and wallah - instant nuclear holocaust. Luckily these energies dissipate in the atmosphere itself.
5. Snake arrow - My favorite one. This arrow transforms itself into a viper and can kill the opponent with its bite - Matter into Life. Now you know how life came to earth. There is this sudden pressure gradient at the tip of the arrow, and excessive heat produced by the radiating sun and enough gases in the atmosphere to start a Frankenstein process and "It's alive... It's alive..... It's A L I V E"
6. Mustard gas arrow - Obviously a poisonous gas emanating arrow. This is mere extension of the water gushing arrow. Solid state to gaseous state. Simple....
7. Sleep inducing arrow - Chloroform existed back in the old ages. Think people. Think nerdy....

And now with the arrows depleting from the ammunition deck, it's time to throw other stuff;

8. The Chakra - Kitcha Niveda Mulaliiiiiiii. Spinning wheel with a sharp cog. More like a frizbee action. If dogs were used in these wars, there would have been no deaths. Just "Here boy. (whistle whistle whistle) here boy (Tssk tssk tssk)" and woosh followed by bow bow bow and a sticky licky tongue
9. The swords - I wonder why they throw the swords for no reason. I'd rather walk across the war field and say "Anga! Let's fence. First one to bleed loses"
10. Clubs - Naaay! It's too heavy to throw clubs. Let's carry them down the aisle of death and start smashing each others skull.
posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Tuesday, March 25, 2008 0 comments


Epics Revamped

Disclaimer: This post is not intended to blasphemy the cultural heritage as represented by Indian mythology. It is a mere trial to scribe some of my random thoughts in a humorous way. Feel free to challenge me, disagree with me, or tell me I’m completely nuts in the comments section of the entry (But remember that the eraser is with me. So keep it polite, please).

Camouflage might mean a great deal of tool for clandestine operations. But it wasn't the case in the myths. For example take most of the stories (or sub stories in the case of epics like Ramayana and Mahabharata), there is this king (young, handsome, got a few wives and still is feeling bored) who has this urge to go for hunting (why can't he just sit around and swat flies?). Instead of trying to hit the apple over someones head, he tries to conquer the feeding end of the food chain - The Tiger! (why the tiger is yet another story) It is rather unlikely to say that, if he opts for a rabbit, then he needs to use more focus (as the field of the target has shrunk by an uncomfortable level) and gaiety (as the rabbit can jump behind a bush whereas if the king jumps behind a bush, then ahem ahem... Just imagine). To avoid any arguments lets blame the sidha medicine for not inventing glasses to focus on the rabbit and the zillion dollar jewels that he wears which makes him uncomfortably robotic in his movements.

And now, comes our Saint (of course there's no Indian mythology without a wise saint). This guy has no job and all he does is sit around praying to the Lord. Now the funny part is, all saints prefer tiger skin for a cushion (Do saints have a hand in poaching?) and a place deep in the jungle (If God's everywhere, then why the jungle? Why give him the pain to stand behind a thorn bush and grant wishes?). Obviously, there appears a situation where the king sights the tiger skin, has an optical illusion that it is sleeping (Smart king. Never tries a moving target) and never notices the saffron color of the saint (Guess they are saffron color blind - runs in the generation) and wallah - instant accident. Thanks to archaic arrow weaponry the saint doesn't die instantaneously, and no thanks (again) to archery, the saint has enough energy to revitalize his anger (aren't they supposed to be patient with everyone?), that he takes his water bottle (ya! you know what I meant here), pours a few drops in his hand (I would prefer moisturizer or bug spray in the jungle), gives a 'shaap' to the king for his accidental mistake (they are trained in black magic too???) and then a free water wash for the dehydrated king (After shave lotion might be soothing. But saints never shave their beard. So this point accepted).

It doesn't end with the shaap. Our benevolent king ends up apologizing, and the subsiding volcanic saint, gives him an idea to clear of his curse (He should have just killed the king) and then the story continues.... Yet to come in the future, why zillion names appear in Indian epics, what is the effect of using Arrow Launch vehicle in the past, How did the ghadhayudham (Bheems, Duryodhans) appear, etc... Stay tuned (Might take longer than expected - this week looks scary busy)
posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Monday, March 24, 2008 0 comments


I am known by the friendship I have in me

"Address, Rent, Rent/Head, Bedrooms, Restrooms, Utilities available, Utilities total cost, Dishwasher, Washing Machine, Group, Balcony" and a few other columns were what, that represented the excel sheet I named 'House'. As soon as the file opened I remembered what its purpose had been - to find a new apartment to live at.

About two and a half years ago (January 27th 06 if my recollection is correct) is when I prepared this excel sheet. A day later, I went to this house, with the address 453 Woodland Avenue, Lexington and knocked the door. The guy, a short, lanky, ever smiling guy, who opened the door was someone I knew from my math class. Someone who came ten minutes late (always), and yet, managed to answer all the questions involved in the differential equations class. Strangely, for a person who either read the college kernel or copied home work of other subjects, he irrefutably seemed nerdy to me. Though most of the columns in the sheet were marked in a legend that meant 'Not a good option', the column rent/head and group, made me take that house as an option. Luckily, at that moment I believed that there were three other nerdy guys and a complete stranger.

Since the very next day till now, I've been wondering and shaking my head in disbelief that, how bad I judged them as nerdy. It has been more than two years I've been associated with this group and now in two days, the last man standing - Anand who has been the sole pillar of my existence is NOT leaving, but going to be left at a place, from where on, he can continue his career. Two years....... Two most important years of my life he stood beside me for what I was, for what I did, for what I transformed to and now he departs in a fashion that, he had engraved in me a character, a character to question, and also answer my very own confusions. The only word he used to answer all my questions - "SO?" There never had been an answer from him. Whatever I am now is because of what I answered myself, but I would have never thought of dwelling for an answer if it wasn't for his presence.

I am told almost by every good person I've met (everyone has something really good in them if you intend to really see it) that I am a good friend. So if I tell you that if I consider that someone is a great person and friend, then its got more value (if you think am self boasting, then hell yes I am boasting, but for a reason). I consider this short, lanky, ever smiling guy as my Best Friend.

'Best Friend' - strangely the words, just rekindled a memory. Once I was asked or should I put it as questioned from an equally close person, "What's a best friend? And why do you classify friends into best friends and all other friends?" Well I never answered, and shall never try to, coz it wasn't easy to explain in words. It is to be felt, to be cherished, to be remembered, to be taught, to be spread, to live with and in the end to die with. Above all relationships in the world, a friends relationship is the purest form of emotional ecstasy one can achieve and only a handful of people appear so in ones entire lifetime. I am in bliss that I found the most important one, at an young age. Whatever the future might hold for me or for him, these two years will remain as the pillar for what we shall become.

Strangely I am not sad about him leaving, but I do have some tears of joy wetting my freckle spot. (The following statement your about to read, is written about 30 seconds after the sentence you just read). The added wonder of confirming that my lachrymals are working fine and that I finally found when and how to make them flood, is just making me finish this post and walk out to my restroom and wash my face. A person is known by his friends. I am known by the friendship I have in me.
posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Thursday, March 20, 2008 0 comments


The Last King of Scotland

Marvelous, Wonderful, Excellent, Brilliant!!! A wonderful movie depicting the reality behind the life of Idi Amin. More than the life behind his brutal tactics, the representation of Amin as a jovial, fun filled, extremely happy person through the eyes of young Dr. Nicholas Garrigan, makes you believe that Idi Amin Dada (original name), in fact had two faces. While McAvoy (of Becoming Jane) charmed his presence and skill in every scene (equally competitive was Whitaker), Whitaker totally dumb founded the media world using his sheer brilliance. Truly he deserved the Oscar. If One Day in September (Watch this before watching Munich - another master piece) showed Kevin Macdonald's way of narrating truth, this one shows his skill to depict facts.

I would give it a score of 9/10. I would give it a 9.5 if they had not wasted initial minutes in showing McAvoy's playful mood with Gillian Anderson. This is a movie I recommend people to see. (note there are some gory truth involved in the movie)
posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Monday, March 17, 2008 0 comments


Spring Broke

"Why are you not here? It's spring break God Dammit!" her angry tone was immense enough, that I swear, I would have heard it even if my Cingular signal was lost.

Instead of giving her a reason about my absence, I just told her the truth. And the truth was - "I forgot all about Spring Break" And what was the mistake in telling the truth? I told it on the speaker phone. The next one hour was linguistic holocaust from all my peer (here I mean equally crazy and adventurous) friends who missed me the most. Unfortunately now I hold the blame for spraining a friends ankle, even though I was here having fun reading Mirror Dance, while he ended up going tail down in his hand glider. The punishment for this insane accusation - I'll be hunted and dropped dead [Hey Volkswagen Beatle - U can't even hit a mosquito and now your the chief of this co op =)) You made my spring break]. One more time - Am real sorry Octagons! :(

By the way, what exactly did I enjoy doing, this spring break?
1. Preparing the poster for tomorrow's conference.
2. Proved most of my friends that I do suck in a lot of things and pressing my formals is the worst I suck at.
3. Bought some elastic bands, an Asian bamboo artifact (cheap one) and making a bow out of it. Did some archery practice over the backyards where the train stops till the bamboo broke.
4. Preparing a new recipe (which for safety reasons was in a low quantity) and then cursing myself for not making enough to savor more later in the day.
5. And finally forgetting that I was sitting in Lazyington during Spring break :D
posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Sunday, March 16, 2008 0 comments


Past Presented Futuristically

Holding my tummy in agony of laughing for ten whole minutes, I pushed my nephew off me and got up. My brother shared the laughter and couldn't believe what I was experiencing. Rewinding a few minutes before the ten minutes of intense laughter.....

"No chocolate for you SON!" my brother suggested.
"Gah gah gooo. Ayyiiii Nhooooo" (I know) cutely uttered my nephew, and he stretched high and kept his tiny hands into the bowl of chocolates.
"Lewis Jay... Get your hands off there" blurted my brother with a loudened tone.
Instantly Jay froze, took his hands slowly off the bowl and turned his back towards my brother and focussed his vision on something in the kitchen.
"Off the kitchen. Come here" commanded my brother just to make sure Jay did not make any more mess in the kitchen.
Both time and space looked frozen around Jay. He never even twitched those minutes of command. Thirty seconds into his 'authoritative' way of growing up his son, my brother went angry and said, "Hey Jay. Now look at me when I'm talking to you"
Nope! The back muscles still resembled concrete to us. He never moved. I even assumed that he never winked focusing on the other side.
"When I'm talking to you, better look at me" he ordered one more time with a higher tone. An instantaneous time travel I experienced and there I was sitting on one corner of the dining table mixing my curry with my rice. Mom's eyes were moist and was about to flood her beautiful cheeks while dads eyes were turning red (no exaggeration. It does for real when he is angry). The same words echoed then. My dad saying, "When I'm talking to you, better look at me"
There he stood face down looking at the ground, both hands forwards holding together as if they were tied by an invisible rope, legs stiffened and eyes blinking in fear.

"Now look at me before I give you a time out" my brothers shouting words brought me back into reality. (Time out is what he uses for 'your grounded' to my nephew - more like a small punishment) There the brave soul took its role. Jay turned around slowly, had his hands holding each other exactly like my brother used to do in the past to our dad, raised his head towards the sky, and did eye contact with his father. Then he gave the cutest smile we ever got from him. Literally I was amazed, at this sight. The future holds interesting episodes from now on, I felt.
Then it took ten minutes for me to stop laughing. 'Like father, Like son' is going to be hell interesting.

Still with the family stuff: While my bro is freaking abt being an interpreter for the India trip (in September for his sons birthday to be celebrated in his grand parents presence), mom is cribbing about me not joining them to shoulder her emotions (I'm really becoming a bad son not even trying to consoler her now a days). Dad's already complaining about, he not getting a partner to practice his so called American accent, while my sister in law and granny are excited about going to watch the Taj Mahal and New Delhi. I, in the meantime have no words for my family members. I'm just trying to avoid them :(

Off the Chirra's: I and my roomie dealed a next summer Euro trip for ten days as we depart from India towards the States. Did the biggest online discussion with a few other nerds like me on Sheldon's phenomenon about Superman's effort to save Louis Lane. A lil disappointed I feel about my advisor informing me his absence for Monday's poster presentation (Damn! I finally have results and he will be not there to see me answer my pars). And finally somehow I'm introspective (statistically saying, at least once in every free mind time and that's every second today) about the statement my roomie gave me today. For he walked crazily lost trying to follow his memory towards the path that led to the post office, I was confused trying to point him that the easiest route to the post office is right there in front of him and that he followed me. His simple answer for that, "Chill. I follow my instincts and you follow your IQ towards distances and displacements." Though this sentence had nothing to do with the situation, somehow it looped me into introspection for which I'm still holding a question mark. Strangely I've been judgmental in situations where I'm supposed to follow my instincts. Thanks to it, am paying my price.... The weekend is gonna be one hell of a rot....
posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Friday, March 14, 2008 0 comments

Fourth floor, third window from the right

'36 hours!' surprised, I checked the time on the walk signal. 23, 22 and ticking... Walking in a posture that resembled a mentally retarded patient, I imagined a chess board as I stepped over each white cross line. "HHHHHHOOOOONNNNNNKKKKK" and I shook off from my deranged imagination. Was it the combined effect of the acidic accumulation in my cerebrospinal fluid and that of a pseudo active short term memory recognition on the crossing ticker, I got furious over the car (which in fact, I looked only at the front bumper) driver. The debilitating, energy sapping, mentally forced, emotionally puzzled, wink hours led me to actually stretch only my middle finger. As the hand with its unique semiotic representation raised from my pocket, my pupil dilated in disbelief coz what I saw was native. It was no ordinary car. It was a cop. By the time my hands raised in parallel to his perspective vision, my forefinger (without prior brain signal) stretched in sync with the middle one and there I was, showing 'Peace' 'Victory' 'Rabbit Ears' to the cop. What happened for the next 30 seconds is still blank.

And there he was lingering in his usual limp-and-hold-pant-walk and punched me in his usual greeting style as I approached him after crossing the near f worded zebra. 'Yo Haarri! Ssssup? ' If it had been any other day, I'd have given him an equally enthusiastic 'Nothing much dude! Jus havin fun'. But today, yet again the sleep deprived inner alpha soul took control, and gave an answer which made me look stupid.
"A smiley face and not the invisible God"
"Huh???" his face was radiating confusion.
I said, "Sorry. Been on a stretch for nearly 1 and a half days. That's the smiley I've been talking about" and I pointed up at the fourth floor, third window from the right. And there he saw the smiley face that looks at me and makes me smile every time I walk past the building.

Off the pavement: Had a sleep like a baby nap for 4 straight hours, watched Big Bang Theory and wasted a few ten minutes writing my very own dialogues if Leslie (my most favorite character in the show) dated Sheldon. Later revisited all the theories, paradigms, corollaries, concepts that were mentioned in the Big Bang (Been years that I watched cartoon which were the only source of science I understood the most). Did a three mile jog just coz the weather seemed perfect for an outing. Played for an hour with a friend's dog and ended up being licked from head to toe. And ya before I go, what is that, which keeps me occupied at nights when I walk back home (coz most of the fun stuff occurs when am walking during the day). Well, I count lights in cars, check for tetris patterns in office buildings and do a lot of other crazy stuff. And finally for the first time I believe that the six degrees of freedom concept holds true even in getting information that supposed to be obtained in a single degree in the first place.
posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Friday, March 14, 2008 2 comments



A fictional hospital scene between characters Robin William (Patch Adams), Wayne Szalinski (Honey! I shrunk the kids), Cuba Gooding Jr (Brashear – Men of Honor) and a patient (Tom). (Imaginative and trying to add a little laughter to it. So try imagining the conversation in their respective voices and tones)

(The darkness tunnels into a red smudge. Tom’s eyes open slowly and he sees a short man with a red clown nose ball lifted with a broad smile)

Patch: Ah! The spring of life! Hey Tom, I’m Dr. Patch Adams. You just awoke from a forty year coma.

Tom: Ouch! My stomach hurts. What year is it?

Patch: It’s 2848 and that (pointing to the stomach) preserves a forty year old rusty coin buried in your tummy. Somehow you swallowed it and went into coma……. But don’t worry. We’ve got our specialists ready to go under the belly and fish it out.

(Specialist Carl Brashear and surgeon advisor Dr. Wayne Szalinski walk in through the ward door)

Patch: Ooooh Ooh! You look good Wayne. New trainer?

Wayne: Naah! I’m on a special diet. No toxic waste. And I also shrunk my shrink and am not feeling mentally weird.

(Shrunk his shrink? What does that mean? Ouch again! My stomach)

Patch: Good! But you still are a geek! And you Dr. Brashear, heard a great deal about you. How is Billy?

Brashear: Sir! ‘Do NOT’ call him Billy! He is the legendary MASTER CHIEF Billy Sunday of the Naval Marine Corps who found the Scuba 1130 which got him the ‘honorary’ Presidential Award!

Patch: “Howling Hooligans!” Damn! I’m from “Emerson Elementary”. I once drew a picture of a rabbit that got me ‘twoooooo gold stars’. Hmmmph!!

(Tom goes restless! What is a marine doctor doing here? Is the world in war?)

Wayne: Now! Now! We are all experts here. Now let’s see how we can cure this patient of ours!

Patch: Yuppie Geek squad! Is he gonna ‘take the cab back’, or is he gonna keep breathing? Hope you have the skill Brashear. This one’s a first timer. Never seen a case like this before.

Brashear: Sir! Yes Sir! The doctor diver of the naval academy is not a fighting man. He is a salvage expert. If it is lost in gastric juice, he finds it. If it is sunk in the depths of the colon, he brings it up, if it is in the way of the anal rectum, he moves it. If he is lucky, he will die young, 2 ml beneath the gastro waves, for that is the closest he’ll get being a hero. And we live on the greatest character our academy has taught us.

Patch: And haughtily what would that be cookie? (where did that speech come from?)

Brashear: GUTS sir!

Wayne: Then guts is what we dig in for now. Pffft!

(The Marine cadets bring in the Scuba 1130 – a big metal helmet to withstand pressure of great heights, a copper moulded titanium alloyed suit, mounted with a mirror imaged surgeon tool kit)

Tom: Is this a joke? Can’t he operate without this monstrous suit?

Patch: Mmmmmm. You see, down below the dungeons of your lower intestine, there lies the stench monster. We use the helmet so that he doesn’t smell it and faint or have a taste of your intestinal fluids and start happy hunting ground. And while he walks through your stomach, he doesn’t want to be treated like in the Aaaaalien movie… Aaaaaaoooooooo….. So we DO need the suit!

(Tom flinches to Patch’s howling sound)

Tom: He, he, he walks inside my body? How can that be possible? Your all nuts!

Wayne: Ahem! That would be because of my invention Tom. It is called the ‘Honey I shrunk the doctor’ phenomenon. I shall shrink Dr. Brashear to the NANOSCALE and then he shall walk into your stomach and then to your gut and he shall remove the rusty coin. The only thing is, now your gut though is 4 meters long would feel like a 300 mile flush ride for Brashear. Hope his suit holds the pressure….

Patch: Welcome to the “world of Nanomedicine!” I’d rather prefer C3-PO to wiggle out my mucosa than sending “Dr. Sir! Yes Sir!” over here.

(Brashear suits up and then Wayne zaps him with his shrink machine and they open Tom’s mouth and send Brashear in)

Patch: I’ll be out attending other aliens. By the way, if we bury your ass up. I’ve got a place to park my bike. Cheerios!

And here ends my half hour break. Back to my nanotechnology research for the futuristic nanomedicine.

posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Tuesday, March 11, 2008 0 comments


One Hour contd.....

Read previous post before continuing further

It's 4:45 am (My watch still says 3:45 am) and it's minutes before I crash so that I get up for my individual meeting at 8:30

My hunger stricken tummy controlled my brain so much that here is my answer for the question the twins posted (assume guys) to me.
'Hmmm... Actually the main problem is, I don't know who among you is really the eldest coz somehow you guys got mixed up in the welcome party. And you guys looked so similar. You were like Twins (:P). I couldn't find you apart from each other. So me being right handed decided to make the right handed kid (pointing to the eldest) as the eldest among the two'

Pardon my insensitivity towards a thoughtful joke (the above statement). Am just feeling the weight of my eyelids on me. Anyway before signing off the day, as this Bard would tell u, lies the rub with my mind - I ended up questioning again.

Eldest Twin (Stick to this assumption): 'What!!!! You are not sure of who is the eldest among us?'
Me: 'Errrrrrr....' (will I still be using Errrr years later. Ah Crap.. This is assumption)
Eldest Twin: 'Errrr.... NO Errr..... dad!!! Why don't we try carbon dating like they do for animals to find who is the eldest?'

And that is my question my dear fellow researchers and scientists and of course benchers in IT industries. What is the boundary limit for carbon dating? Minutes? Months? Mesoic Era? ;)
posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Monday, March 10, 2008 1 comments

One Hour

The time just jumped by an hour (day light or evening light savings or whatever). I've got to finish my report after post processing some data and I've been living the whole day on mints and water. Am going home to finish the report and sleep (or nap or a power nap at least or a wink might be).

Question: YOUR (assume) eldest twin baby is born at 1:59 am and the other actually is born at 02:01 am on the second Sunday of March (of course in the states). Several years later they fight and the argument comes to the point;
Eldest: You were born an hour late
Younger: No! I was born only two minutes late. It was the damn day light savings that pushed me to 3:01 am

Both come to you and ask which is factual. How would you handle this situation? As for me, I've got the walk back home now to think about a simple yet smart answer. Shall post it if I find one. :D
posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Monday, March 10, 2008 0 comments


Slide record.....

“Unbelievable” was the only word I had at the Camerata Nordica (Terje Tonnesen). The two hour orchestral levity was special. Mistakes stupid enough to question my reason in continuing PhD marked the concert. Searching for the lost lab note for nearly 5 minutes while I had it in my hand all the time, getting into an elevator at the first floor and pressing the ‘first floor button’ not twice but thrice and still blinking on why the heck didn’t it move to basement, sticking a ‘Please do not shut this door. Be right back in 5 minutes’ post it on the door of the AFM lab and pushing the post it hard enough (in the pretext of gluing it firmly), that I pushed the door myself shut, and finally, going to the Student Center for an orchestra which showcased exactly 24 hours ago. Thankfully the Nordica’s were still in town performing in Richmond and I got in time.

Was Terje worthy enough to skip a good friend’s birthday? Well this time it was a tie between the two maestros, but luckily, the three hour playful chat with him that night made both the events worthwhile. Was it the aura of the aria, I ended up listening to ‘Nostalgia’ from Yanni, while a rarely ‘as crazy as me’ guy decided to slide action in the parking lot of iHOP for ten whole minutes. And ‘yes’ I had to teach him the exact control of drifting while holding the broken seat belt of my funny sister from another mother (that’s the new term we use for close friends – he is my musical brother from another mother :P).

As we reached back home, I decided to use the snow to my advantage, and ran as fast as I can in the parking lot and did a side slide. Impressive enough? I won’t consider, but fun enough, that it brought the kid in all four of us and we did a short havoc in the parking lot sliding and running like lunatics. While the snowman, and the usual snowball fight had to wait till the morning, the game of solid ice hit had to take place at 2 in the morning along with the crazy slides [I had wheezing trouble after nearly an year coz of this :(]. The feeling of blood boiling the frozen fingers was just ‘rejuvenating’ As I closed my eyes as I slept, I was laughing at the amount of fun we all had playing as kids. Guess I wasn’t crazy after all.

‘Butterfly dance’ shook my spirit as Yanni brought back memories of adrenaline this morning. A look at the juniors taking pictures across limestone, gave me the energy to test them for some cricket skills. End result: we played snow ball across the city road. One against seven! Thankfully, my practice throws, before meeting them ensured a lean patch on my sweatshirt while a wet cold day for their jackets.

‘That’s the department door’ ‘Wait there’s the peaceful white snow waiting for one more slide from me’ ‘Here it goes’, I said to myself, ran as fast as I can on the pavement and two hops on the snowy surface and Sllllliiiiiiiiiiiiddddddeeeeeee. ‘Damn this is longer than I’ve ever done’ ‘I need a scale’ ‘Here goes’ and thud!!! I jumped parallel to the slide and stretched my hands. (check the picture for the length of the slide) Went back to the lab, measured the height I reach with my stretched hands and a new personal slide record – 2.3 meters. After the lab, walked all the way across campus to Youngs library and with the help of a cardboard box (folded dreadfully into my bag) I tried sleighing. Only at the third attempt, I ended up not crashing on my face.

‘Seven! That’s awesome K K’ half an hour later, six people were lying on the ice rink shouting ‘Ouch! That hurts’ and all I had to do was teach them how to skate on ice. An hour later, while first timers braved their struggle into the center of the rink balancing over a tight rope, I ended up skating backwards. Hurray!! Now I skate backwards too. A few minutes later, Gwen Stefani ooohooooed ‘Sweet Escape’ and we decided to do a group dance on the ice rink. It was all fun. We’ve decided to keep ice skating as a monthly event from now on. My thud rate today: Nada. Zero :D (Except the heavy fall with a 220 lb friend on top of me coz I tried to teach him a little fast. But at the end he thoroughly enjoyed the stay in the rink and that mattered the most)

For all the Tamil people in the world, if you think of going for a suicide, just give me a promise. Watch the movie ‘Yaruku Yaro – Step nee’ directed by Joe (where the heck is that rock?) and the lead role was done by our one and only famous Sam Anderson (where is the rotten egg?). After watching this actor and the movie, I’d promise you, that you will seriously love your life like anything. God! Only coz of these guys south Indian movies are always mocked. Yesterdays Dil Dosti etc was a million times better than this movie.

And finally, something self satisfactory: For the first time I saw a paycheck entirely to be spent for myself. Just chipped in fifty bucks for the Udavum Karangal organization and spoke with some old friends. Now I can stick to my bed with a long awaited smile. Skipped tomorrows Tennessee outlet mall trip and gonna finish the rest of the lab work. KYNANOMAT 08 finally seems promising.

Err….. One more thing. My fortune cookie during dinner had the words ‘Someone special admires you’ :o Someone really there? I just pocketed the fortune and am hoping to see it work… :)

posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Saturday, March 08, 2008 0 comments


Back to Usuality!

200th Post: (I just kept my laptop aside and did a celebrating break dance)
With Deux (the previous post) rambling the few dew drops I generated to the brim (that never rained), I guess its time to get back to 'fun'tastic life.

With Power naps forming a weapon in disguise, I've been experiencing realistic dreams (scratch scratch....). What am trying to explain is, I can feel my dream, but I am also physically and mentally present in the real world. I am so tired that dreams happen in an instant I close my eyes, but I am focussed so much on my awakening time (an hour or two down the minute) so that I can continue my experiments, I know exactly what I'm doing in the room, or where I am etc. Strangely, this alpha state is working miracles, coz I've been concentrating on my 'to-do' list during such sessions and it is working magic. (my dream girl secretary looks hot)

Warm weather in winter - what does it bring into our dried eyes? Men, you guessed it right! Free shows from pretty ladies (Girls! now chill out.... Read to the end of the post and then decide upon my character). With the usual walks seeming to become a daily pattern in life, I decided to chip in a new sport just to increase my concentration skills. I managed to settle behind some pretty lady every time I walk alone (a few meters from her tantalising buxom :D) and started sighting the oggling eyes of the opposite passerbys (what is the damn word I forget every time I use passer bys). Catching the exact motion of the eye has in fact been the toughest sport I've ever encountered. Instead of me representing the various other fun stuff, I would suggest the readers to try it out. It brings laughter like anything. PS the fun is better when the oggling eyes are that of a girl and my sportive bait analyzer is a guy (how come they see him and not me? :( ]

About me: I realized recently that I chew 99% of my food using my left molar. I tried shifting it to the other side and the result was - I bit my tongue twice. Ousssssssssssh!!! Hope I don't end up in a fist fight with some locals and have my left molars spilled out.

Other than that: Never ever watch the movie 'About Schmidt' Somehow this movie brought me into questioning my lifestyle in the first case and the result was horrific. But I'd admit that Jack Nicholson played a wonderful role. Anyways, its 2 in the morning and I've got an hour before I run to the lab and pick my sample out from the reactor. All set and done for a wonderful life ahead....
posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Friday, March 07, 2008 0 comments


Handful of promising results, the 3rd floor smiley kite, a new flip of the shoes, long found friends, a few phone calls to forgotten friends, re cap of year long mails and chats, the hands free ride for half an hour in a bicycle, the ever remembering flash of light as I enter the parking lot, the rainbow dew my eyes noticed at the dusky sky, and much more created its miracle over my path over the past few days, but none seemed to drive me out my 'unbelievable and laughing' nod.

My heart was smiling at these sights, but my mind was questioning the integrity of my reasoning for believing 'why these sights make me merry?' I needed that light, that essence of proof, and I got answer for my question from my very own echo.

A few months ago, I used the sentence 'Be happy. Everything bad happened in one day. At least it didn't happen over the entire period of the week. You can be cool tomorrow not worrying about things might happen. You'll just realize that yesterday was a bad day' to a friend of mine. A few days ago, I called at 2 in the morning to a warm huggable friend of mine and made him not to delete his orkut account.

Well, two days ago, I saw him, with his unlikely haphazard pony tail luring as a bait, pulling me in to his physique, where he was busy pulling a seemingly ton of trash from the fourth counter. The cigarette fell off balance and he burnt his hand. Yelling in agony, he gave one final heave to the trash bag and there I witnessed a deluge. Thanks to the crying lords, and some lunatics idea of dumping Old English beer in the trash, he was drenched with the shivering stinking liquid.

It wasn't mercy this time, that made me go to his help. I guess it was the free half a gallon of gasoline he allowed me to fill my car with, or it was the half a dozen free coffees he gave me free at my night outs, or it might be even his stylish pony tail, that I approached him.

With the beer and mugged out trash reeking a stench of death, I decided to reconsider my decision to help him out. Instead, I stuck on to, 'Guess it's been a bad day!'
'Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! (as if he was letting out his final breath before gulping the stench from the mess) But it's fine. Tomorrow will be back to fun'
I felt a slap hit my face. The next few minutes walk to my place would definitely be the best two minutes of my life. There are a few advices which I don't follow myself and this incident allowed me to fit in the most important parameter of my self evaluation. With things swelling in sight, I swallowed my glut of anguish and incomprehensibly preposterous thoughts and started living life with a new step advanced.
While retirement, seemed harder than failed love, the knowledge of experience helped me start back into life. The effect, a call from my advisor to my apartment and we discussing a conceptual theory of an analysis over the phone (which never seemed to spark my memory before), the huggable friend calling me at 10:30 as I was about to have my power nap and thanking me for the simplest of the favors I ever did, a recovery of the self developed short hand notes from the game book, an unbelievable meeting with the new comers in the cricket group, and a great sight over my future.
I feel the same spark of successful confidence as I had before I gave an affirmative to my dad before moving to Chennai, before I took my IIT exam, before I erased my answers from the Bio Entrance, threw the Biotech admission letter, gave up a few colleges as I entered Anna Univ, took my first podium in gokart, gave up the many softy interviews, took my GRE and TOEFL, and most of all giving up a hefty salaried job in pursuit of PhD. Three years it had been, three long years and now I feel back to the state I entered the States. My decision over my future - career and personal seems legitimate and heart filled perfect.
The past is out there, the future is destined, and now means just now for me. A few realizations has made me start my introduction to my new book on life. It's rocking time from now on.
posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Friday, March 07, 2008 0 comments



Hmmmm… reviews, and that too from me. Let the agnostic God I believe in help you out. I’ve got a diverse bunch of aspects to cover in this post. So please bear upon with my skills of trying to ‘Sell a product’ in the name of reviews.

Movie: “Vantage Point”

A well directed masterpiece from Pete Travis. Watch this movie to understand the real mind of a terrorist. The only other movie that robbed my awe of a masterful treachery was Arlington Roadfrom Ehren Kruger (The Ring guy). But as my deeply provocative mind ever questions the frame for ambiguity, as I watch any movie, here’s one that made me go “That’s Strange”. Imagine a scene in a movie, when the hero or villain (in most cases) points his gun at an oncoming car, and then pulls out the driver of the car and then Vroooom… Wild Car Chase. Here is my question. ‘How come every time this scene happens in a movie, the driver ends up not wearing his seat belt (makes it damn easy for the gunman to pull the driver out)? Why don’t you just pedal to the metal and slam the gunman and continue your drive?’

Book: “Sophie’s World: A Novel About the History of Philosophy” by Jostein Gaarder

Now, now! Don’t get into conclusion that I’m a philosophical guy. (Strangely at the age of mid twenties, you take life serious – your called philosophical. You take life the fun way – your called wild. Hmm, where do I stand?) I got my answers from this book (at least a bit).

Magazine: “The Score”

A friends appeal to write a review on this magazine is the sole reason I decided to score this post in the first place. Well here it goes Alan.

“In a generation which opts to the mellifluous waves of depicting the inner conscience, which instead of silencing the expression of opinion, ramifies ones emotions into a mastery of character, the search for the right note has indeed been the greatest victory we, the new generation, have ever made”

Now whoever understood what I said above – consider yourself as ‘Tested and Approved for psychiatric therapy’. If you haven’t configured what I just ranted, then good, you’re normal. ‘The Score’ magazine is a first generation music oriented magazine that has been introduced back in South India. Unlike other contemporary music magazines, this ones special. It’s contents diverse right into the hearts of ‘all kinds’ of music lovers. Be it, a Carnatic fanatic (sounds rhyming) or a Fugazi azi, you’ve ended up looking at the right book. What’s other than music that captured my interests in holding its copy? It’s showcase on the aspect of being humane to the society you live with. ‘Silence and Darkness’ – a special part of the magazine, focuses on the ‘serve the needy and make the world happy’ side of the current generation. Long gone are the days, when all you did was donate money or clothes to show your interest for the improvement of society. Here come the days, where, you participate in rekindling the lost laughs of happiness from the souls of true needy. It is enough that we gave food for the hungry. It is time that we teach them how to cook food for themselves.

Anyway, before I get lost in the philosophical part of trying to be humane, I’ll walk out of this review on ‘The Score’ The oncoming special edition has pages on the true Maestro – AR, himself. A few peeks on Blaze’s rap, a slight Q&A with the jewel thief (Dev), a delicious entrée from Pedatha, a sneak peak at IIT Saarang 08, a head banging desert from Iron Maiden (they visited Chennai), and a lot more.

And Finally Culinary: “Jaunoodle”

(Definitely not girly) 2 eggs scrambled with a tint of condiments added to about 100 grams of boiled and fried mixed vegetables (everything and anything you find edible), is added to the boiling 2 minute Maggi noodles (Even if its Maggi, we try the chef way of life). Add chopped cilantro leaves to the mixture (am bad with culinary vocabulary), use a fork to noodle out the mixing procedure. Once it’s done, chip in a few mozzarella cheese shreds and viola – bon apetit. Variations suggested: no cilantro no probs, try pudhina chutnee on the side.

Off Reviews: Sachin’s back on form, and my team’s in pathetic shape. A huge deal of issues to look at, even before I can register the team for the tournament. I’ve had enough fluids to cope up with my cramp problems. Now it’s time to eat for stamina and work out for some pull shots. My work hours in experiments have gone up, but results are still holding back. The flower show was awesomaniacal. I wish I had a pure SLR in my hands. This week is extremely busy with evening life seeming interestingly skillful. And I just turned up the last call for volunteering in the ex Indian Presidents visit for research reasons.

posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Sunday, March 02, 2008 0 comments