Indian Ameri

Friday

A Lot in Short

Joy: I had a two minute work in the lab (3:30 am), and unusually I had access to my roomie’s cycle. Spent 5 minutes in finishing my work, but cycled around the city for half an hour. While my orb-glass was draped in the cloak of the moonly mist, produced by the choo choo steam for life, my legs pedal pumped as hard and fast as it can, that the cold wind stroked my cheek as piercing as it can.

Sorrow: Censored :D

Pain: Got hit with a candle holder from a lunatic drunk friend on the radius. Even wearing gloves is hurting. I can't risk anymore injuries before the season. Got to stay active and alive

Thought: Here’s something for everyone. A man runs away from a mob. He enters a bridge. He is stranded by the mob from both sides. He decides to jump into the river beneath. Question: 'Why the hell does he remove his shirt before he jumps into the water? Does he come later to collect the shirt?' Strangely this happens in most bridge related videos and here’s one (Why the hell can’t I be normal not looking into things that doesn’t meet the normal eye?)

Serious: HUD (where did they come from?) made my house owner to reject us from renewing our lease for the next year. One more time I need to shift my house (I need to get a caravan soon)

Fortune: Someone already added an extra quarter in the washer when I went for laundry. Good luck eh! Well, I found a quarter and a nickel on the side. Lucky day eh! I opened the dryer and a crumpled, taught, dried, Hamilton green ten dollar bill, just dropped. We (roomies too) spent that money on Perkins food (Gosh! I had to avoid the concept of using money wisely from shorty, somehow)

Contemplate: Suddenly I want to believe in the existence of God. Coz if there’s God, then thereought to be a hell. So I’d rather believe in Hell and remain happy in the rest of my life leaving my sins to be punished in the eternal inferno of hell rather than, spending my punishments in the earthly world (confused?? I’m still confused over the concept of paying for one’s sins. Sin is a relative concept and that's the biggest problem of the human spirit)

Tex: (Tex – Wild guy; from my advisor :D) I’ve never done skydiving, but as I checked the some links, I’ve decided to do the solo dive instead of the tandem sky diving method (which means hooked to an expert) Is there by any chance I’ll be hooked to a beautiful girl? :P

Dilemma: KYNANOMAT 08 conference is up soon and am seriously rethinking of wasting my time (wasting? :o) in the name of spring break. PS I shall be using three days of my work time visiting my roomie (departing soon for his job) for his birthday in April

Bizarre: The same close friend who’d been advising me in not falling in love (err... He is not the only reason) for the past three years, has in fact had a secret love affair with one of my close friends (and that too for four years). ‘Hush hush’, they had been and I feel like Joey. Am the first to find it from both of ‘em. Get me a meatball sandwich and I’ll keep my mouth shut.

Play: Mr. Adamant(ly funny), is sleeping on the couch and talking to me for hours (as I work with my laptop) at night. I feel that he is missing my other roomie a lot (in the other room and is moving out for his career soon) and is trying to understand my frequency (I just resonate). If I don't reciprocate, he would use the Walmart Water gun he bought two weeks ago on me. Some day am gonna pour water over him as a wake up call...

Blessing: “How come I never see a 'proposal' in such a restaurant before? Does it happen only on the screen?” is what I felt when I had dinner in PF Changs. A few minutes later, I and my roomies witnessed a live proposal (the smart guy kept the ring in the fortune cookie). And there goes the poor guys fortune for the rest of his life (:D)

Oddity: Murphy’s law – By sheer coincidence, my advisor visits my lab at a time, when I’m either done with an experiment or am about to do one. It feels awkward for me to be the one looking to be stuck to the chair when he comes in. Today his timing was so perfect that, as soon as he saw me, I had to wear my lab coat and take a sample out. Strangely it might seem different in his eyes.

posted by Unknown at Friday, February 29, 2008 0 comments

Wednesday

Pencil Traffic

“Hari we are waiting!” impounded my brain as I walked out of the car stuck in traffic at Upper Street. “Darn it! How did I forget the group meeting? #$@#@%%^!@#” I cursed myself as I walked brisk through the cars.
Tens of feet later, I hear, “Excuse me Boy!”
‘Boy? Huh?’ crept my mind as I twisted my neck towards the voice. I saw this construction worker staring at me with his pad of plans.
“Can I borrow your pen?”
Without any thought, I dwelled through my zipped neck covered sweatshirt (now I got confused on how did he know that I had a pen when it is covered under the warmth of my sweatshirt?) and pulled my parker out. Thanks to the usual gesture of always removing the cap before I give the pen (always ensured that I get my pen back), he said, “Oh Sorry! If you need it, you can keep it sir. I needed one for a couple of hours”
I smiled at him, took my beloved parker back, and walked a step.
Was it the word ‘Sir’ he addressed me with (not ‘boy’ this time), I just stopped and said
“Actually I might have a spare pen in my bag” and before he can respond, I strapped out of my right backpack loop, flung my backpack in a zestful motion, zipped the accessory pocket, and took a pencil out (I wish some Kollywood director was there to copy the style).
“I’ve got a pencil. Is that fine?” smiling sheepishly at him.
“That would be just fine sir” (not the sir again)

‘Dude, the meeting’ hit my thought. I gave him the pencil and started running (as if I was afraid of the stranger).
A confused “Thanks Sir” (not the 'sir' again, the 'boy' is fine), was all I heard.

Catching my breath, I waited to cross Limestone near Arbys and I heard a voice, “Son! Which way is the UK Med Center?”
(‘Boy’ ‘Sir’ and now ‘Son’) and I showed the old gentleman his directions. This time I had to talk faster coz of two reasons – The words, “Hari! Meeeeeting” and “Hari! Traffiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiic behind the car”

Minutes later I had to do a two second tap dance (the carpet and my leather shoes really glued to the floor) in front of my lab group, as I missed the birthday song of a fellow friendly colleague. At least, they all laughed happily. Worth trying to tap dance.

Off the Meeting Marathon:
‘When COexisting, COnveying INICIDENTS keeps you COnfused, just accept them as COINCIDENCE :))’ – this gtalk status message of mine, gave a record ‘good status message’ count in years. Of course, I had a deep discussion of identifying the thin line between coincidence and intentional signals with my ever convincing roomie (he didn't even know the reason behind this question). I just accepted Denzel as one of the best directors, after seeing Samantha Booke (with an E) give ‘One Tight Slap’ to Henry Lowe (also with an E) in ‘The Great Debaters’. I like the attitude of the girl shown in the movie. No sobbings, no silencing out, no closure, just a straight-simple-clear-slap. Made more sense than ever (at least for me). Finally; 3 posts in an hour of boredom. Back to my journals (got to get the results working out)
posted by Unknown at Wednesday, February 27, 2008 1 comments

Daddy Day Care

Blurred by the disability of normal sight, I saw a blue colored short man walking towards my bed. Yawning out of my energy bar 15 minute nap, I imagined, the real image of what my roomie represented in his formal shirt and trouser. After substantiating my imagination by wearing my glasses, I was happy to see my roomie finally getting ready for his career fair. I don’t know how long it had been that I saw him in formals (he is a strong person and is chasing his dream job), but today it felt great to see him in that attire.

After wearing his shoes, he started walking towards the main door into the rain dampened, dark clouded, definite pouring day. “Take my umbrella”, I cooed.
“Naaaaaaaaah! Its fine”, he replied modestly.
“It’s gonna rain today. Better take it for your interview”, I adviced.
“I have this rain coat” pointing to his water proof jacket “and its just a career fair. No interviews today”, he laughed out.
Even the cumulative voice I generated in the 90 minutes of Linkin Park concert, I attended yesterday, wouldn’t have matched the yell I gave him, “Don’t fool around! I don’t care if its just a fair or even a circus (huh?). I don’t want to see you drenched in any format (pointing to his trousers) and go around asking for job applications”
“The pants would still get wet if I use the umbrella”, trying to convince me.
“Get the damn Umbrella and get the hell out of my sight”, anger poured.
He took the umbrella and left smiling at me (as always. Never pisses him off).

After he left, I tried counting the number of incidents I’d been yelled at (other than my dad – that’s why the title: daddy day care) coz I was casual, or over confident or when I took chances. Fortunately (/unfortunately), my fingers never opened up from the locked fists (not even my mom. That’s strange). Poor guy (or a lucky friend), we ended up buying him suit for tomorrows interview and spent $200 overall on his purchases. Had a pre interview load up in PF Changs (spent $85 on that :O). I just hope he gets his job soon. With his birthday coming in April, I'm confused over spending a vacation during spring break.
posted by Unknown at Wednesday, February 27, 2008 0 comments

The ‘Year’ned Character


“Hari, please switch off the lights and shut the door when you are done”, once again the words dictated through my mind as I was about to shut the lab door. I blinked at the desiccator hood lights, and moved towards it and switched it off. As usual I walked around the work table and switched the weighing balance too. Then I wondered, “Why doesn’t any one else mind to switch off the weighing balance?”

As I walked in the flurries of flowing stars, I realized the statement that kept reeling in my mind as I was shutting the door. More than nine years it had been that I playfully did this trial of switching off lights and fan every time I left the class last back in school. Soon in years, it became a practice and eventually as a fun activity when I walked rounds in every floor of my under graduate three storied building and switched off the lights in every class room as I walked pass the corridor. Final year became a routine practice, when I even stretched with my clumsy hands through the windows of the analytical chemistry lab and switched off the lights. Strangely, now it has become an involuntary action instead of a responsible feeling. If someone asks, ‘What can you tell about yourself?’ I can say this for sure – “I turn off the lights every time I leave a room” (Does it sound funny? At least it does in a good way).

What was first a trial has become a temptation
What was first a temptation has become a habit
What was first a habit has become a trait
What was first a trait has become a character

Luckily in addition to this, I’d been having this odd quality which makes me unique from the rest of the world (as far as I know). From the first day of the millennium, I’d been making smiley faces out of years (been eight years now and it shall still continue) when I write dates. For example, the three zeroes of 2000, where represented as Center ‘0’ shown as a face while both the right and left ‘0’s had been drawn smaller than the center one and in touch with the center bigger face ‘0’ that they look like ears. And then 2001 turned to an ear studded dude, 2002 as a guy with a pencil in his ear etc. Fortunately for 2008 to 2110; I have no issue in continuing this style (unless I’m turned to plant fodder – isn’t it obvious?) But if I end up turning my very own lights, try dating my 'death on my gravestone' with a smiley.
(Finally I finish this simple blog – Whew!)
posted by Unknown at Wednesday, February 27, 2008 0 comments

Saturday

French Kiss

'Do I get a free kiss with it?' (she gave a confused, blank and shy smile while my friend laughed in shock staring at my face)

'At least on the cheek?' (there was a little hesitance in her face. But there was a thought going in the mind. My friend just smiled uncomfortably at the girl behind the counter)

'Just kidding. Thanks for the coffee' and I signed my receipt and walked away with my French Kiss Latte to the lounge with my friend.

'Daiii I thought you were joking. Naan nenachen (I thought) you won't do it. Never ever am I gonna challenge you or doubt your words' yelled in whispers my friend.
'Lux. Just gave it a shot. Kedacha kiss, illati miss (Either I get a kiss or I miss [nothing])' I replied back with a smile.

The rest of the stay in common grounds coffee shop was usual with some fun. Good news - I made sense to Lux that I wasn't flirting, but just making her job a little more fun filled. Bad news - I had to promise her that I won't order French Kiss anymore. That leaves me with only one other option that contains no form of chocolate - Honey Bear Latte ('Come on Honey! Gimme a free Bear hug' :D)

After spending a couple of more hours giggling over PJ's with some more friends, I came home and watched 'The air I breathe in' at 5 in the morning. Though I've been avoiding a lot of conceptual thoughts, this movie really put me in a state of assertion over my actions. Truly to say, I've been upto my words most of the time. But the few promises I've broken hadn't affected my destiny except... the one I am bordering on over a few months. Should I break a promise and lose character to win or should I accept defeat and still be a man of my words? Unusually I am leaving the choice to time. What else is unusual? My long silenced roommate finally came up and asked me a philosophical question, 'When do you lose hope?' For which I replied, 'How long would you keep hope?' Though our mutual thoughts went into the world for materialistic facts, both our hearts were stuck in the mud of issues. Both I and my roommate didn't know the answer for my question and both of us wanted to time travel into the future to see the moments that might change our lives. Till then we wait. Other than this, I just watched a dozen short films (Hugh, Le Nouveau, Ambush, The Goodbye place, Rock fish, Madagascar - Christmas Penguins, Replay, etc) and am all blank.
posted by Unknown at Saturday, February 23, 2008 3 comments

Friday

Fun Packed Day

Ice storm warning – School closed at 2 pm, and the whole hectare of researchers absconded using the raining opportunity. “Is it somewhat closer to ‘day-after-tomorrow’?” kept me stuck to my lab coat. A long sheet of spacer plastic, a couple of lenses, duct tape and I built my very own telescope in the lab (trying to catch a glimpse of yesterdays lunar eclipse today). Luckily, I spent hours trying to find the focal point between the two lenses and finally I gave up on it as the sky went shadowing.

Was it Meryl Streep?, I don’t know, but somehow I brought myself sitting in front of my lab computer watching the ‘Joker of Batman’s *’ smile of Anna Hathway (is she in anyway related to ‘Jack Nicholson *’?) in ‘The Devil Wears Prada’. Soar to the stomach with her acting; I decided to pitch in at one more experiment waiting for the ‘silence before the storm’ to give way to at least a thunderous cooch.

Thirty minutes later, I lost all patience waiting for the storm to set in, and headed back home. With the ice rain forming a mirrored rink of sleet, I managed to extract fun out of every step. Did a dozen slingshot slides using the electric poles as my supports and thanks to one such stunt, a white Ford pulled over and a mid 40’s guy offered me a lift. Only later after rejecting the offer and having a small chit chat, I noticed that the car had an antenna at the back. He was a damn Cop checking whether I was lunatic or drunk.

Remember the days when you played water gun during your childhood? At home I revisited my childhood days playing water gun with my other roomie in the patio. I shot at least a gallon of water on cars, frozen trees, neighbor’s doors, a cool dog (grred back in a much cooler way), and of course my roomie. Then I got a call from my friend asking for some anti-skid company back home. Teaching where to walk on such sleek situations (always on the road and on the grass), I made up to Coopers, where I met a bunch of my friends. Ended up even savoring some Indian sweets. Yet again had a chance to have fun in the iced roads by accompanying my ‘slip and fall down’ scared junior to his lab.

On the way returning home, I purposefully took the ramp route and had fun sliding up the ramps (I tried to go uphill struggling to have a grip on the pavement). How true it is when they say, ‘Fortune favors the brave’ My ramp route blessed me, in offering help to four angels. The one similarity they had – All were very Very VEry VERy VERY beautiful. The only difference – one was a blond, the other blonder, the third blondest, and finally a blondestest (:D). Now this is what I call golden shooting stars at 1:30 in the morning. The rest of the night, clocked out watching Jodha Akbar with a bottle of non alcoholic wine (grape juice to be precise). At the end of the movie I was wondering where the hell did ‘In Lamhon ke Daaman Mein’ disappear in the movie.

Off the fun packed day: Errrr…. (Am using the word ‘Errrr’ a lot now a days), what other things do I care for, off the fun filled, blond blessed, water gun fought, cop questioned, brave skated, Nicholson laughed day???
posted by Unknown at Friday, February 22, 2008 0 comments

Thursday

The Wheel Chair



“F**k you all! I need to talk to the doctor!” furiously shouted the University senior quarterback Leon at his team mates.
“Boy! Get your marbles. Don’t make a fuzz about the situation”, replied Coach Martin in an inferno tone.
“It’s only a bruise coach. I can play the championship eyes closed. Come On! It’s the Boars for Pete’s sake” “I hate sitting in this bed” continued Leon.

The doctor’s advice of keeping Leon in bed rest resulted in disappointment among the university supporters. Three days later, the jumpers won by a huge margin with the help of the new heroic quarterback. Three months have gone down the clock, and Leon was still recovering from his injury. With the semester coming to an end, the prospective of making into the club teams seemed a gargantuan struggle.
Pointing at the wheel chair the doctor said, “You can now move around the hospital”
With bed rest loosening his muscles, Leon lost all hopes of feeling a smile reach his lips. Two days into the recovery period, Leon lost interest in a comeback. Head drooped, eyes focused on his left bruised ankle, he cursed every second of his post trauma life. He avoided all fans, press and even his family. The wheel chair seemed like a biggest rejection of his life. He lost all spark to live.

“Hi Mr. Ummm…. Hmmmm… Mr. Leon”, muttered Vikram reading the patients name from the pad. “I am going to be your patient trasporter for today”, continued Vikram in his typical Indian accent.
‘Ah! Great! He doesn’t even know who I am’ thought Leon.

While Vikram felt that the day was running faster than it seems, Leon scrounged every thing he saw or felt or talked to. Vikram noticed his sense of disappointment in life. He tried talking to Leon, but he never got a chance to utter any comfortable words.

As both neared the bridge between the hospital and the recovery center, Vikram tried one more time, “Mr. Leon. Can you tell me about football?”
“F**k you! Am pissed off sitting in this wheel chair. I can’t even walk you a*****. Get the hell out of my face you ******”
Leon threw invectives at Vikram.

A push is all Leon felt from behind and the wheel chair raced against the bridge ramp. He drifted to the left, missed the nearby by passer. As he was about to hit the left wall, Leon gave a push at it using his hands, and now the chair veered vibrantly to the right going straight to the parking lot elevators. Leon’s mind went blank enough to forget about the brakes installed in the new chairs. None of the other people walking in the bridge tried to catch his wheel chair. As he was about to crash into the opening elevator doors, Leon decided to dump out of the chair. As he was about to jump, he noticed a small girl coming out of the elevator holding a teddy bear. With no other option, Leon heaved himself out of the chair and jumped around to stop the raging chair from hitting the girl or the elevator. As the chair came to a stop, Leon, threw the chair with fury and ran towards Vikram like a raging bull. He evaded every person who witnessed the incident and reached Vikram. Minutes later, Vikram was on the floor holding his left eye pounding with pain. Vikram got up from his ground, and looked at the 6 foot 3 quarterback and said, “How does your ankle feel now? LOSER!!!”

Several months later, on a Friday evening, Vikram checked his mail looking for his pay stub, and he found a ticket and a note which read,
‘Hey buddy! How’s the black eye doing? I’ve got tickets to the Super bowl (Making it to the playoffs, I’ve got them free). How about accepting the ticket and coming over to the game. I’ll be there to teach you what football is all about’

Off the Chair: With bro taking the car with him to his new work place, mom and dad are ‘torturing’ me into buying my first car (at least this time they want me to buy it for self). Strangely I’ve been avoiding discussions on how I managed to pay off all debts and am avoiding any discussion related to the car torture. But somehow, today I’m feeling very much interested in a bike (a Yamaha) rather than a car. I’m just behaving normal like I used to do when all I had to take care of was I. But with this bike interest, shadowing through my mind, I’m confused over the question, “Am I turning into a rotten kid?”

posted by Unknown at Thursday, February 21, 2008 0 comments

Wednesday

You asked for it Sir!!!

Sometimes even those big time ‘Live America’ lovers would use their Desi circumstantial influence to get things worked around in the States. Fortunately today, the drabble I did in my bank was worth learnt. It’s been ages that I showed my red eyes to anyone in US. Unfortunately the bank manager got to witness the angry side of me. He asked for a battle, and I gave him one hell of a war. Thanks to the drama, I had to enact, I ended up saving $350. I was damn f***en pissed off, that I ended up popping my sweatshirt zipper in one pull and threw it hard on the ground. But there was something different about the way I felt my blood boiling. Even before I gave him an indication to be scared of what I might do, I ended up being self scared about my anger. I somehow had a control over the level of anger I can show off and at least for me, it’s something good.

Other than this, am extremely busy with lab work, and yet managing to go to Coffee Island with India-returned friends, watched my first basketball game in Rupp Arena (free tickets from my advisor), yelled at the top of my voice supporting my Univ (even though I wore the wrong shirt supporting the opponents), had a new muscle of my back getting pulled (as I jumped over a short wall), spending incredible amounts of time with roomies (not talking a word to them and yet learning a lot about myself), playing tic-tac-toe with some anonymous stranger (he/she marks her position on an electric switch box on the intersection of Virginia and Huguelet and we continue the game), and lesser and lesser music now a days. Getting real honest in accepting past simple mistakes with friends though it ends up derogating my image. Donated blood for the fourth time in the States and was happy to see a couple of my good Indian friends going to do the same (some blood donation campaigns do not require you to be in the States for three years to avoid malaria immunization. You can donate blood just like the way you did back in India). Trying to settle my brother finally and might go to New York soon. In short, a million changes happening in life, and strangely I don’t know what to do with these changes. It’s time to get back to my schedule. Adios….


The one song that somehow suits my mindset and my liking: Ironic by Alanis Morisette
posted by Unknown at Wednesday, February 20, 2008 0 comments

Monday

The Insomniac Compass

Energy revitalized from the laughter gathered from the jokes of eight friends at Dennys I left to Pennsylvania on a short notice at midnight. Though the work was just an hours’ job related to my brother, I decided to pitch in some moral support with my presence in the trip. For a guy who had driven almost 95% of the entire trips non stop in the States and nearly never been on the navigator’s seat in any of the long journeys, I was wacky.

While the going journey turned pretty important for the self estimation am undergoing, the coming journey was lunatic. Shooting scaling questions on my personality to my brother (whom I had to convince to come into friendly mindset instead of a brother), we spent nearly three hours analyzing my positives and negatives. Though his perspective had been based on the twenty odd years he has spent with me, he was dead right on my negatives. Thanks to the first ever friendly talk we had in years, I looked right into the mirror and found how rude my reflection had been.

From “Why me God?” to “What am I gonna do now?” to “Is this the right thing to do?” to “What I am doing is the right thing” to “What else can I do?” in years, now the only thing that keeps me an insomniac compass is “Is this what I’m really made of?” While the end pages of the mob phase turning good, the introduction pages of the self growth phase is turning out to be pretty intriguing. Thanks to the million estimation questions generated, we’d ended up two hours before the arrival time.

Everything went perfect in Pennsylvania. Instead of the post job drive being to be celebrative, it turned out to be very much emotional. The blaze of sacrifice was so intense that both of us ended up taking the punishment of hunger for a long time. There was complete silence even at Applebee’s where we finally pit stopped for a heavy meal. No music, no song, no talk, no jokes, nothing seemed to break our silence. As the saying goes ‘Time Heals’, I eventually ended up teaching my ‘just a fast driver and not a smart driver’ brother the tricks of safe and smart driving in a practical way instead of giving way for our emotions to ruin the rest of the trip.

While I’m very much determined on the chosen path I’d taken for my career oriented social life, the concept of time heals really throws doubtful stones on my decision wall. With the many spot on decisions worked to curve the lips of several souls, the thoughtful long sought decision on my futuristic life seems to attract questions into many foreheads. I wish the truth of time heals works magic on my favor on the many questions that am yet to be faced for sure.

The face of confusion: ‘I’ took several ‘snaps of myself’ over the trip (:o). That’s how awkward my thoughtful tongue was hooked in the trip. PS I learnt that navigation is not my style. Driving is the easiest work I can ever do in a trip.

posted by Unknown at Monday, February 18, 2008 0 comments

Friday

Anti-Cupid 2 the rescue

What better ways can you celebrate Valentines Day rather than sharing your love to the many friends you know in your life! Of course, you’ve got be single before you even think of spending time with your friends than with your other half. With almost every other petal friend of my flower life’s been pulled out of my stem (Loves me/loves me not fashion) coz of the careers, futures, families, travels associated at this mid 20’s age, I decided not to leave the sole culprit my ‘loneliness’ ruin my most determined age of my life. The result: enormous self satisfaction. I managed to do experiments related to three of my projects, analyzed and smiled at the worst of the lot results. While work hours proved pretty jingling and dancy with the dedicated songs to undergrads and other colleagues (dedicated the coolest and the crappiest of songs that made every love filled heart to dance around), the after life of work hours proved enticing. Managed to pull in several broken hearts into an ensemble of fun-filled life, and was showered with their happiness all over the day.

Pretty much made enough acts of whims, that I ended up possessing 2 bouquets of red roses, half a dozen single roses (white ones this time), 3 personal valentine cards from friends, one lovely thank you card from my nephew, and a spammed inbox from 123greetings. The fun fact is I managed not to spend a single cent in return (fact - $17 billion profit is what the US govt had today last year). Had a quick free peek in Natasha’s Café where several lovebirds were fretted with the drama-piss off show (who knows if the waitress hitting on your hubby was a professional actor or not), walked south of campus to spend some quality time in singles night (my intention was just to have fun rather than getting hooked up to some girl).

The funniest or the most remarkable situations that happened were the ones when I advised my brother on what to do on Valentines Day (awkwardly true! He was my elder brother and I had to suggest him stuff. God help me from my family) and talked my mom into yelling at dad for not doing anything for her on Valentines Day. Dad just went to the level of sighing to me about ‘why he sent that first love letter to mom?’ Of course mom’s replies were pretty much a slap to men like me and dad (I was thinking, where the hell I came into the picture all of a sudden?) Several chat boxes ended with ‘May Cupid be away from you’ note instead of the usual over n out. The one thing I learnt from the Valentine week was many broken hearts rue this day to never show up. The one thing I made sure at the end of this day was the same broken hearts loved this day for what it carries in the air. Am I one of those Valentine saints? I don’t care coz I had fun.

posted by Unknown at Friday, February 15, 2008 0 comments

Yet Another Special Day

Yes! It is of course a special day in my life. It’s been nearly three years that I succumbed to the process of asking my friends for money to help my brother’s situation. Finally today, after all the hassles I’d gone through, after all the risks I managed to peek into, I deposited the last of the many grand debts into my University account. I’ve set up transactions to make sure that every friend of mine who helped me at the thickest of situations get their respective returns this coming Wednesday (thanks to the hold on the huge check, I need to wait till Wednesday). Though I thought, I’d be depending on my parents to clear his debt; I managed to pull out yet another part of my life not depending on my parents. To make things great, my brothers finally behaving like the elder one he is supposed to be, and is showing much interest and maturity in his forthcoming business venture. I’m quite confident that it is finally time for me to give him his much needed freedom to be financially strong.

Truly saying, if ‘Money comes today, goes tomorrow’ is a fact, then the vice versa is also very true. I’m proud of what I’ve done today. Though I should be exhaling a big relief sigh, I’d thank the situation I had over the three years, without which I would have never learnt the many arts of making money. I’d been legal in all these three years and that makes my life simple. For the first time, in a few months, I’ll be seriously seeing my entire monthly graduate paycheck to be used only for self reasons. I owe big time to all my friends who helped me out. Simple thanks would never fill the magnitude of the many helped hearts: seniors, juniors, colleagues, strangers (everyone’s been a friend).

Instead of keeping my feelings of relief and gratitude pour out into many words of exaggeration (at least that’s what most of the lovely friends think. How more humble can they become?), I’ll finish the post with one simple line

“I and my brother owe you guys till our grave. Thanks again”

posted by Unknown at Friday, February 15, 2008 0 comments

Wednesday

Dragon Lord


"Welcome to the city of Xalapa"
Jose along with his new friend walked cross the sign board and headed towards the city fair. With the lights dazzling across the evening sky, Jose gave Juan a wink.

"My friend Juan here wants to take part in the traditional Dragon Lord competition" Jose informed the old curly moustached man couching on the registration counter. The old man took a look at the lanky lad and showed a doubtful face at Jose.
"Can he survive the first few pieces?" bellowed the old man.
“Wait and see! We’ll round the $2000 and the trophy for sure”, assured Jose.

The clock struck 8:00 pm and the competition began. Two-time defending champion Carlos, dug right into the dish and started hogging the Javanero chili with intense pace. While the rest of the competitors burnt their tongues eating the spicy Javaneros, Juan went slow and calm at the start. Two minutes into the round, the amateurs started to ‘Ssssssss’ and ‘Aaahhhhhhh’ at the blazing peppers, while Carlos steadied his lead by finishing the fourth of the fifteen Javaneros. Juan snacked the third one with ease.

Five minutes into the fiery competition, and most of the participants started to gulp the last drop of the one liter water provided to them. Carlos stared at Juan, the only other competitor successfully eating the peppers without consuming even a single droplet of water. With the Dragon Lord Trophy at stake, Carlos focused on the bowl of Javaneros. He told himself, “None can eat the remaining 10” and he dwelled into the hot bowl of chilies.

Fifteen minutes surpassed. The crowd yelled ‘Carlos’ ‘Carlos’ ‘Carlos’. Juan had two more Javaneros to finish. Carlos was into the last one. But with water proving to be nearly empty, made Carlos sweat at the last piece. With at most determination Carlos rooted the last piece into his mouth. He chewed it and felt the fire ashen his mouth, the heat broiled his breath and as soon as he finished the last piece, he ran to the nearby pool and drowned his head into it. The crowd was on a high. They were cheering yet again at Carlos, the undefeated champion of the Dragon Lord game.

Slowly the cheer came to hushes. Juan finished the last Javanero and looked at Jose. Jose gave him a nod and Juan as if he never tasted a Javanero in his lifetime, started eating a Javanero from his neighbors bowl. The crowd went agape. There was silence among the city crowd. With his burning mouth open Carlos couldn’t believe what he was watching.

Jose understood the situation and asked Juan to stop. Juan kept the half finished seventeenth Javanero and drank half the water of his pitcher. Juan collected the prize from the hands of the frozen city mayor and walked off the dais. Juan and Jose walked past the gates of the fair and disappeared into darkness.

“See I told you amigo. You can still win standing on the dais in front of the city crowd even if you lost your tongue in an accident” Juan smiled at Jose and both the friends continued their walk counting the $2000 outside Xalapa with the Dragon Lord Trophy shining in the moon lit sky.

posted by Unknown at Wednesday, February 13, 2008 0 comments

Tuesday

The Scariest Stare!!!

Remember the time when you do a naughty act in front of someone real important, that instead of shouting at your mischief, your mom gives you a cold stare. While my dad’s stare makes me laugh, my mom’s shake me go snuggle to my Snuggies. Instead of time traveling to the childish moment, I’ll just say that I had to give an awkward smile (and of course had a tint of fear trying to wet my pants on a cold day), to a lady on the road.

With my curb-side-skip-glide-walk gaining attention and fame among most of my friends (especially ladies), I was thinking of inventing a new style and with yesterdays icy weather giving the public prominent skating experiences, I decided to test some of my prototype walk glides. Thanks to the yellow hooded no-care-fun-filled-life kid, he aped my act and had a thud to his butt. While I scratched my head and apologized in lip sync muteness to the lady, I received a warm no problem nod from her (the chalega style). Smiling at the ‘back to my feet, yippee’ kid, I continued my amble, and as soon as I saw this chunk of glittering ice pushed to the side of the intersection, the uncontrolled naughty par of my life, gave it a huge ‘Bend it like Beckham’ kick. Thanks to the boots, splattered were the little shards of ice all over the road.

As the lady and her son approached the intersection where I was waiting for the walk signal to appear, the kid let go of his mom’s hands, ran towards another chunk and gave it a big kick. Noticing his 'New Balance' shoes my mind read ‘Ouch’ while my eyes noticed ‘mommy....’ from his about to cry eyes. I shifted my gaze at the lady and there I had the scariest stare!!!!! No apologies this time, just a “Come on Hari. Try the smile. Heeeeeee….. No not that one, idiot. The real one….. Heeeeeeeeee….. OK. Enough now. Shut your flash and keep your head down…. Hee heee heeee…. You’re a sitting duck…. He… There's the walk signal. Escaaapppeeeeeeeee……….” And off I ran to the other end. “Whew! That was close” As I raised my head to watch 'em again, I saw the stare. Strangely the mist of her breath seemed like fire.

Off the Stare: Yesterday night, I had to use the word ‘Ssuuwweeeettt!!!’ again as I walked out from my lab into the snow capped white peaceful ambience. The whole walk was lovely. I took the longest route to my apt enjoying the play on the fresh snow. Attended a birthday party and while returning got a call from my junior who wanted company to his lab and I gave one. In the interim for his arrival, I did sleighing behind the Univ Library with some sophomores. It was fun. After departing from his lab, as I entered the medical center zone, a Ford truck slid of the road and hit a nearby parked car. It was a heavy hit and I had to call 911. Thanks to the ‘If you call 911. You need to stay on the spot till the cop arrives’ concept, I managed to make an ice man (of course after the driver was taken to safety). As I came home late, my roomie asked about my whereabouts and instead of asking me, “What happened to the driver?” he asked me, “Why did you call the cops. Doesn’t he have a cell phone?” for which my other roomie said, “A. You know Hari. Social Welfare guy” My reaction – I never cared.

posted by Unknown at Tuesday, February 12, 2008 0 comments

Monday

Gosh! I forgot my Charger

Few years into the 2010’s you’ll no longer need to write ‘Take the cell phone and ipod charger’ in your travel check list. Just make sure that you have your feet intact to use the 'human dynamo'. I guess the futuristic Duracell ad would have the rabbit wearing a battery pack wired to a small gear chip to its tail or ears or knee and might run the entire century non stop. The modified tag would be ‘Duracell. Lasts longer, much longer, longer than your life’
Amaron India might show a typical girl-hitting ad, where an old man's car stops on a pitch black road in an unhealthy area. Of course he is accompanied by his beautiful granddaughter. In comes our hero in a flash (bright enough to light the dark road. Also is accompanied by his dark side kick), connects the Amaron battery wires to his knee dynamo and does a dance (trying to impress the girl). While the old man and hero's side kick seem confused that the hero got a shock from the battery, the Amaron battery charges up from the dynamo effect and the car gets a boost. After the usual tagline, the granddaughter does the usual wink wink wink look at our hero and he comments, ‘Bhijili ho gayi' [:D] followed by our side kicks usual mockery 'aour gaadi chal gayi' [=))]
posted by Unknown at Monday, February 11, 2008 0 comments

One can never compare blankness

Earnings, risks, accidents, fear, guilt, favors, love, hatred, enjoyment, adventures, responsibilities, patriotism, acceptance, successes, failures, and much more are the sole factors that govern the way humans compare one person ‘from the rest’. Comparison, by far more is the greatest weakness humans have in selecting the character scale of a stranger. While life seems to go in the placid lake for most blah blah blah.....

“I am consumed by the blankness of a saintly void. The flame of silence keeps it brightly filled”

Off the comparison: blah.. blah... blah..... After years, I watched live cricket (alone) and thoroughly enjoyed the advertisements and the game. blah blah blah..... I walked all the way to the lab wearing my fleece (at 12 F), looking down at my feet, and yet managed to stay warm both on the surface and on the inside. Strangely saying, I feel as if I am at the start line of life again, and I wanna face the world again. PS. the quotes part of my blog had its three digits finally. Man, I've really become slow in generating new quotes
posted by Unknown at Monday, February 11, 2008 0 comments

Saturday

Seniority's not my style

Years have passed by, and now I am considered as a senior in my community. The same guy who called every 24 and 25 year old guy a Bhai or Anna (bro) and every other elderly girl with their respective names with an 'ie' or 'y' 'ae' at the end (:D), is now called an Anna or a Bhai. A poor girl is being bathed in eggs, milk and the rest of kitchen armory right now as I am writing this post. A year before I was, did, and planned lots of similar events. Now all I do is, go on time minutes before the cake is cut, get received on red carpet with juniors standing on both sides giving me the 'Hi Anna', 'Hey Bro', 'Wazup Hari?', 'How are you doing Bhai?', etc. And as crazy as the age remains, the juniors somehow give me this immense level of respect - I always get the first cake, Juniors take photos with me, I am pushed forward to witness all birthdays, get to taste everyone's culinary skills and give them suggestions, get free tickets to many places, offered plans to spend time at their homes on weekends, etc.

Fortunately today I broke that barrier of age (come on! Seriously am just a year or two elder to these guys and gals), and broke into the party club and made some friendly fun. I made it clear enough to them about the concept of seniority that now as I departed upstairs to my apartment, I was called just Hari by most of them and it felt good. But as I reached my door, a new member of the cricket team, 'Yo Captain! Forgot your iPod' Now that's going to be a huge task!

Off Seniority: I visited nearly most of my friends an hour ago (Fortunately I found everyone gathered in three different places), and yet decided to spend the night at home. I'm gonna watch a couple of movies and then crash. Long weekend ahead with the new initiator prospectively proving to be helpful. A couple of friends are going to perform in tomorrows inaugural function and they need me to be there as a motivation booster (Huh... well I feel the same). The B&W art gallery is opening on the 11th and the photos are gonna be up (mine is also included in it). Talking about photography, found my charger as I moved out of my old apt, but don't expect any pictures, coz am tightening my belt on masterpieces for the photo gallery I am showcasing by the end of 09 back in India.....

Ciao and Enjoy the weekend......
posted by Unknown at Saturday, February 09, 2008 0 comments

=))

Some little things that make my life simply 'AWESOME'. The following is a short communication mail between myself and my research advisor. But before you read it some small facts that you all have to know about me, my advisor and his opinions on my driving skills.
1. If I get a paper in Science and in Nature, he would allow me to ride his car under one condition (strangely the journals are like your degree certificate which takes you only to the interview), I need to abide to all the rules.
2. I challenged him in the second game of the lab bowling tournament that if the grad team wins against his under grad team, then he should give me the keys of his Lexus for an hour (which of course he never agreed to) and passionately saying, I scored the highest in the entire day though I was the least in the first game (as usual, a slow starter but a fast and smooth finisher)
3. He knows a lot about my driving skills and is determined not to give his car to me.
Saying all this I guess it is time to have some laughs.

Mail from my advisor:
All -
Reynolds, Hari, and I will be traveling to Oxford, OH for magnetic measurements on Monday. Because of this and blah blah blah (changing the weekly individual meeting that happens on monday)

An immediate mail from him correcting the error that in fact it's my other lab mate who is going instead of me (I wasn't even related to that project):
Actually, replace Hari with Nitin…


As you all know how crazy I am in reality, I decided to send him a weekend fun reply and it read:
Ah too bad Dr. Hilt... I thought of having a lab vacation in Oxford... I am being neglected from the field trip... Booo Hoooooo..... :-)
Enjoy the weekend while I try getting some Gels on the surface.
Wish the lab some good results from the trip

For which his reply was:
Thanks Hari...maybe next time the whole crew can go...we may even need
a driver..

I had the loudest and longest laugh in the entire year.
posted by Unknown at Saturday, February 09, 2008 1 comments

Friday

Casual Casualty!!!

As the view of whales playing in the ocean seemed enticing, I jumped from the cruise and as I hit the chilly waters, I heard the background of the AT&T ringtone la la’ing and I woke up from my slumber to answer the call.
“Hi Hari. This is Pam from Cravens. My owner saw your Mazda standing on the parking lot, and it is against rules to keep a totaled car in the residential parking lot. He called the towing company and they are going to tow it by tomorrow. So if you want to do something about it, you need to do it by tonight”
My sleep deprived mind took some time to even think ‘Huh??????’ and after a long pause I mumbled, “Hey Pam! I guess this is the umpteenth time you’re waking me up and warning me about the towing. You never do it and I would appreciate it, if you can tow it by today. Thanks and have a great day” and I hung up my phone.

Sadly, the car still remains in the lot after two days. With all the materialistic issues turning out to be vanishing in the dust, my level of seriousness is going to the drain. Last weekend, when I got caught by a cop in Cincinnati for over speeding (81 in a 55 zone decelerated to 57 in 2 seconds), I and my room mate just gave him the warmest smile he can ever get on a cold month and were left with a warning. While my past experience made me go fury over the mistake, this time, we were cracking jokes while the cop was checking my license history.

On Monday, when I was about to return my rental car, I found it missing. A few investigation of the location turned out to be pretty crappy. I parked in a spot where there was no yellow line, but somehow, that part of the curb was so low that actually the guy living in the nearby house parks his car in the grass field surrounding his house. It took me less than a minute to accept the mistake, and give away $70 for the towing company. No hard feelings was what I had.

Yesterday, while my advisor came to the lab after 5 pm, he saw me chatting with my room mate. Instead of even pretending to work, I just put my favorite song, increased its volume and kept on listening to it. Though I did a lot of work the entire day before he came, it wasn’t supposed to be like that. Then we discussed a lot about my research hassles and prospective plans. My heart felt great once I gave him what I felt about my doubtful decisions.

Yesterday I promised my dad informed me that the traction isn’t helping his slip disc to get back in location. While mom expected me to freak out, I and dad shared this mutual confidence on his health and we chatted friendlier than ever. I ended up even giving him a promise of not biting my nails anymore if he promises to stop mopping the house every morning.

Today, when I noticed that my keys fell from my fleece jacket, that too in a dark place, 20 miles away from Lexington, at 3 in the morning, celebrating a friend’s birthday, I felt a little relaxed. I had this strange thought, that my friends would be assuming that I was faking it to freak them out, and that sense really made me remain casual till I found the keys. While I usually put a lot of thought behind a birthday greeting or quote, this time I wrote the first thing that came into my mind.

I called my part time employer and told him that I’m quitting the job today and gave him my thanks for helping me repay most of my debts. Since I’ve casually came to the level of mentioning about my part time employer, I guess it is time to put the word out. I worked in a BP station for a paltry $5.5/hr for a while. “A While” a word which might seem long enough for most of my friends and my family (I did mention it to my parents yesterday though I knew that they would be dejected on this fact), I felt it as a grain of my earthly life, where I learnt a lot about dedication, hard work, calmness of mind, and above all what humans are really made of. With my 3 months of high ranking successful work back in India, and several months of labor work here in a gas station, I learnt the nuances of how to enjoy work as it comes. The one thing I learnt from this short period is every human in the world be it a con, a thief, a drunkard, a nurse, a manager, a priest, all have a heart which loves to smile all the time. While I managed to call my intention of clearing my debt as ‘Filling Tranquility’, the true sea of tranquility I filled was the multitude of questions related to life and its sheer joy.

Soon are the days, when my best friend leaves for his job, my brother and nephew shall leave for a better future, most of my friends graduating and departing for a prospective growth, and a lot of other petals withering off into a larger tree, and I remain alone on the pistil of life. With the series of new events teaching me infinite lessons, I am feeling self belief (instead of the usual self confidence) to melt the anvil that life is going to bring for me.

I am at the last pages of a phase of life, which has groomed me into a person I am now. While I managed to make at least a few hearts cry in joy in this phase, it is time for me to give some freedom for myself. I am glad that I’ve grown mature enough to accept life as it comes.

I’ve casually grown into a casualty of accepting life as it comes!!!!
posted by Unknown at Friday, February 08, 2008 0 comments

Wednesday

Weathers don't Wither me!

After a heavy meal of Chinese food, I had no plans of making it to the lab to continue my experiment. Fortunately, thunderstorms proved immense enough to keep me snuggling to my bed sheet. While the entire community in my street was scared as the power got cut off twice, I and my room mates had a dead slumber. Decided to join my bro on an early day job and as I reached the lab at 5 in the morning, I was pretty much feeling normal.

The scene I was gifted as I opened the lab door was pretty nasty. Mud, water and dust all over the floor; My computer dripping with rain. Thanks to the lab clean up, somehow everyone forgot to close the window. Though this sight had to throw me off, I ended up slurring 'Sssuuuuuuuuwwweeeeeeeeettt!!!!' as I entered my lab. Took me 2 hours of drying to get my stuff ready for my lab work. Strangely, even after watching all the trees rooted out of the ground as I walked back home for Lunch, I never felt threatened by the weather. Strangely, it is not only the thunderstorm I mention here. As long as my memory can take me, I never refuted the way weather exists in our lives. Be it sultry cricket in Summer, or a skin dry Winter, or a life threatening Thunderstorm, or any other extremity.

My life has pretty much been normal or should I say hardened to most conditions of weather. As I told my friend AL earlier, I used to wear Monkey cap, hood and gloves in 05 Winter. In 06, off went the monkey cap. A scarf was all I had in addition to the normal coat. 07 was pretty much normal though the weather went to the negatives. All I wore and am wearing is one fleece. If I continue in this rate, next winter I'd be wearing just my T shirt and slowly as the decade ends I might end up behind bars for public nuisance coz I walked nude in winter :-)

The thunderstorm just brought me great memories of fun I had back in India. Dad 'ordering' not to go out, while mom 'requests' me not to play out, while I and my buddies end up riding to the other end of the city just to have some fun in the beach - most importantly flying kites and eating ice cream.
posted by Unknown at Wednesday, February 06, 2008 0 comments

Tears of Life!

Aping his dad’s slouch on the couch, little James, started changing the channels of the television. As he flipped through the pages of the television, he ended up watching a sci-fi scene. Impressed by his kid’s interest in science and technology, George, sat with him on the couch.

‘A group of masked men dressed in glittering black stripes, rode in their Levitator 3200, zooming through the intergalactic traffic. As they reached planet Zura, the tallest of the men, browsed through his Curve Ban monocles, and got a confirmation of the location. The latitude, longitude and altitude led to the house, which by now had its screensaver UV filter walls pixelling in raw black. Many Hovers ranging from C class to E class reached the aerial parking of the house and both men and women dressed in black naturals, floated in air with their antigravity shoes.

As the glass tinted coffin glided through the house to the nearby coffin carrier, people started to weep. The hovering monocled masked men, pointed their suction gun on the crowd of lamenters and knobbed to maximum level. While the mourners let their hearts out, the masked men, sucked every ounce of tears floating in the gloomy sky. Once they had their tear sacs filled, the Tear Bees left the planet back to their station.

Once in, they were greeted by their chief, and little bluish gold zakrons collected their sacs. The tears were emptied into the Elixir XD, a machine skying the roofs of the station. Three minutes later, a heavy colorless oil came out of Elixir XD’s tap. Centrion MZX, the lab A.I., commented, “Vaazhkai fluid ready. Concentration 200%. Effectivity – Enough to cure 3 cancer patients”

“Thanks Centrion! Now we can save three men from the tears of others”, sighed the chief. “Soldiers of Tear Bees, Just now got another confirmation of a death. Our estimations show that, we can get two more tear gallons out of this. So gear up and bring some tears”

The Tear Bees zoomed in their Levitators.’

James gave a puzzled look at the television and looked at his dad. Expecting something, his dad smiled. James said, “Dad can I ask you a question?”
George expecting his son to ask him about what the story all meant got into the mind set and nodded an approval at his son.

“If tears in the future are so important to cure people, why don’t they give jobs to a few who can cut Onions and cry a lot? Why should they wait for others to die?”
For this George, had no answers.


Off the Tears of Life: You might have draped a wet cloth around your face, or chewed gum, or used goggles, or bought an expensive cutter or even might have just cried chopping onions. The future has something happy for those lachrymals. Behold the ‘Tearless Onion’
posted by Unknown at Wednesday, February 06, 2008 0 comments

Tuesday

No place for MEN!!!

Beware, Men of the Future! There might be no more Men. Reason: Click to see why!!!! Clearly someone has taken the casual rebuke of ‘Go fuck yourself’ very seriously (courtesy Kakes).....
posted by Unknown at Tuesday, February 05, 2008 1 comments

Monday

Superbowl – a reason to change life!!

Sports strangely but realistically seems to be the spark of life for most adults. While many yesterday supported the Giants or the Patriots, I ended up neutraling to the advertisement part of the show. Yet again, after years, I felt glued to the TV and the sheer excitement of a catch and fall and of course a touch down ended up in a high note. To be true, I am one of those “Whats so good in watching huge hulks of men fall and pummel each other in the quest for an oblong ball?” kind of guy. Yet, I am also the same person who once was a fervent fan of watching multiple sports. While watching has gone to the drain, the playing belt is getting loaded up with new sports of which, in fact is changing the way my life is seen. While the advertisements this year turned out to be an empty shell in the quickdraw, the fourth quarter was a humdinger of a quality.

Yesterday also proved out to be a memory lane event, where along with the usual superbowl excitement, we had a surprise birthday party thrown to a good friend. While my actions had to be plain and unnoticable, to avoid any emotional conflicts, I still ended up holding a part of the wish light. Strangely saying, this moment turned out to be an awkward one for me in my life. Though I had a repercussion of thoughts that screwed my true character, I ended up on a high note on the level of maturity I exposed. Turned out that I even ended up surfeiting my apetite with chocolate and getting my senses and lifestyle tested.

Physical rules of feuds, as I had experienced has always been less painful than the cold wars of playing with ones’ emotions. And I always recommend a slap on my face rather than a zip on my actions. While the past had been a ruckus of life in the unoccupied state, the present has paved its way to the future. ‘There is nothing wrong in giving as long as you don’t expect to get things back in return’ is all I learnt from my atrocities I did to others in life. While my sins have loomed to an exponential factor, I realized that in spite of breaking all the rules of lifestyle I listened to my inner mind to realize that I DO have principles of character in life, which made me believe, my actions turning out to be sin in truth. Principles which in fact enshrouds my true character, a character that reveals me as a gentleman, ‘at least to myself’. For the first time in years of confusion, I truly found the answer for the question, ‘Who am I?’

I sincerely apologize for throwing up the end of the post on a gamma state.

The alpha state crows: I am a needle in a haystack. I am the most searched for and I am the most cherished for. I found myself and I don’t expect anyone else to find me.

posted by Unknown at Monday, February 04, 2008 0 comments

Saturday

Puzzled Perverseness

A well accepted global dialogue would be, “Yuck! How can they kiss each other like that?” at the age of 3-6+. Well this would invariably be the start of ones feelings for the other sex in the sensual way. Strange, but true. We all start thinking of sex as disgusting. Woah! Now hold your horses! This is not a post on the art of sex. Before I give any of that interpretation let me jump directly to my point.

The word ‘perverse’ literarily means (dictionary.com) something ‘directed away from what is right or good’. But basically, you all know the format for when, what for and why we employ it in reality. Lately, I’ve been trying to dish wash my brain just to get back the social humor instead of the raunchy sarcastic and perverted back into my life. And to do so, I decided to keep my mind, off, all perverted jokes. Luckily, somehow I managed to decrease the level of perverseness (the whole post is in regards to jokes and so don't mistake my lifestyle), and am having fun with the other types of jokes. Saying all this, I also submit that perverseness can be used as a tool to judge other people (at least those whom you are not sure of adding to your list of friends)

I tested this theory on multiple bunches on several occasions (disregard my way of representing people as a buch of data points… PLZ) and realized that the best way to keep a group of people (obviously of the age above 18+) active in a discussion is to spice up the talk by throwing words of no sense at random which of course is related to a topic which somehow or someway turned out to be a perverted joke (delivered by someone). The effect; three kinds of people,

1. Those, whose minds are clear of any double entendres (these subjects give a puzzled look and just to stay in the group fake a laugh which is delineated clearly through their folded foreheads)
2. Those, who inevitably are the class of master masons whose imaginative skills can score great heights in the level of perverseness (of course their power of imagination is also so active that once they use them for constructive purposes can prove worthy). And finally
3. The median class whose sight of expressions I always enrich to look at. These targets take a little time to bridge their figment of imagination with the experience of past reality to give the ‘entirely new perspective’ for the words used. They start with the puzzled look staring at the ‘double entendre word deliver’ (though the word has no sense or closeness to perverseness) for a second or two, and then slowly start building a pillar around their figment of imagination (this is the fun part, where you can see their lips start to arch back into a blank smile) and finally as the past reality or experience provides facts to their imagination they end up turning to be the happiest person in the world (blank smile turns to an ear to ear smile and a sparkle appears in their eyes)

Well coming to the conclusion of the post, if you liked watching Joey of FRIENDS’ expression when it comes to realizing a current situation after several seconds, you would love doing this experiment. But as any experiment comes with a safety factor, this one does too. Personally I stopped from throwing any more words onto the experimental group just to safeguard my integrity in terms of being a gentleman. Anyways coming to the question of who among the three you need to be friends with, I would say with anyone whom you would like to be with.


Off the perverseness: After two weeks of intense study (Effect of garments on the heat transfer from human palms) during my daily walk to the school, I put forth my results that if you keep your hands in your jean pocket then you are likely to feel warmer in your hands rather than keeping it in your leather jacket or jerkin or fleece or sweatshirt. The main parameter that governs the heat preserved, in the case of jeans, is ‘how tight is your pant?’

10 hours ago, I had the most intense battle between two other drivers on I 75. Two hours of fierce battle at an average of exceeding 100 mph race and to end the war all three of us signaled our emergency lights for roughly two minutes to accept a draw. Ya ya.. most of you guys would call me or mail me or chat me and give me a thrash on my rash, but on my curve smile behalf, I would rather say that this had been the best drive I ever had in the US and those two blondes (why else would I race? :P) were the safest drivers I’d ever seen. No rules broken and no public pissed off!!

Spent hours, day before yesterday night, in the toys section of Wal-Mart and brought the inner kid in me to have fun (I miss the rapping monkey and talking Elmo). Valentines Day is ahead and so is the deluge of the hearts shape and pink color (surfeited looking into the amount of giftable articles pouring at shops).

Scratched my feet while carrying the couch and so wore my shoes. And scratched my palms moving the television and so wore gloves. And scratched my knee moving utensils and so removed all protective clothes (:D). Am loving arranging stuff in the new apt keeping in mind that the biggest and foremost important criteria in setting things is ‘reachable or not reachable’ for my naughty nephew =))

And finally, pretty much using every minute of my daily life for productive work. No nonsense. Sheer resume building work (there is a definite reason for posting more blogs too). Bringing back some old school artistic perspective back into life as the camera is attracting dust on my shelf. Research is all up and running lightning. Results yet to force me into a paper….
posted by Unknown at Saturday, February 02, 2008 0 comments