Indian Ameri


Epics Revamped

Disclaimer: This post is not intended to blasphemy the cultural heritage as represented by Indian mythology. It is a mere trial to scribe some of my random thoughts in a humorous way. Feel free to challenge me, disagree with me, or tell me I’m completely nuts in the comments section of the entry (But remember that the eraser is with me. So keep it polite, please).

Camouflage might mean a great deal of tool for clandestine operations. But it wasn't the case in the myths. For example take most of the stories (or sub stories in the case of epics like Ramayana and Mahabharata), there is this king (young, handsome, got a few wives and still is feeling bored) who has this urge to go for hunting (why can't he just sit around and swat flies?). Instead of trying to hit the apple over someones head, he tries to conquer the feeding end of the food chain - The Tiger! (why the tiger is yet another story) It is rather unlikely to say that, if he opts for a rabbit, then he needs to use more focus (as the field of the target has shrunk by an uncomfortable level) and gaiety (as the rabbit can jump behind a bush whereas if the king jumps behind a bush, then ahem ahem... Just imagine). To avoid any arguments lets blame the sidha medicine for not inventing glasses to focus on the rabbit and the zillion dollar jewels that he wears which makes him uncomfortably robotic in his movements.

And now, comes our Saint (of course there's no Indian mythology without a wise saint). This guy has no job and all he does is sit around praying to the Lord. Now the funny part is, all saints prefer tiger skin for a cushion (Do saints have a hand in poaching?) and a place deep in the jungle (If God's everywhere, then why the jungle? Why give him the pain to stand behind a thorn bush and grant wishes?). Obviously, there appears a situation where the king sights the tiger skin, has an optical illusion that it is sleeping (Smart king. Never tries a moving target) and never notices the saffron color of the saint (Guess they are saffron color blind - runs in the generation) and wallah - instant accident. Thanks to archaic arrow weaponry the saint doesn't die instantaneously, and no thanks (again) to archery, the saint has enough energy to revitalize his anger (aren't they supposed to be patient with everyone?), that he takes his water bottle (ya! you know what I meant here), pours a few drops in his hand (I would prefer moisturizer or bug spray in the jungle), gives a 'shaap' to the king for his accidental mistake (they are trained in black magic too???) and then a free water wash for the dehydrated king (After shave lotion might be soothing. But saints never shave their beard. So this point accepted).

It doesn't end with the shaap. Our benevolent king ends up apologizing, and the subsiding volcanic saint, gives him an idea to clear of his curse (He should have just killed the king) and then the story continues.... Yet to come in the future, why zillion names appear in Indian epics, what is the effect of using Arrow Launch vehicle in the past, How did the ghadhayudham (Bheems, Duryodhans) appear, etc... Stay tuned (Might take longer than expected - this week looks scary busy)
posted by Hariharasudhan Cd at Monday, March 24, 2008


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